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If It Ain't Right I'll Make It All Right In The Morning!
Don't You Believe In 'em?
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Affecting Cruelty
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Don't You Believe In 'em?

A Circuitous Route

Humour Scenes Home

We know several folks who have a way of beating round and boxing the
compass, from A to Z, and back again, that fairly knocks us into
smithereens. One of these characters came to us the other day, and in a
most mysterious manner, with the utmost earnestness, solemnity, and
hocus pocus, says he--

"Cap'n, (winking,) I wanted to see you--(two winks;) the fact of the
business is, (wink, nod, and double wink,) I've wanted to see you,
badly; you see, I-a--well, what I-a (two winks)--was about to remark
(two nods and a short cough),--that is to say, it don't make much
matter, if-a--(wink, wink, wink;) you see it was in this way,
I-a--wanted to--a, to tell you that (dreadful lot of winks) I've
been--not, to be sure, that it's an uncommon-a thing, (nod, cough, and
forty winks,) but no doubt if I-a--the fact is--"

"Well, what in thunder and rosin is the fact, old boy?" says we.

"The fact is, cap'n, I'd a told you at once, but-a--I don't know why
I--shouldn't tho', (wink on wink,) have you got two shillings you won't
want to use to-day?"

We hadn't!

Next: Major Blink's First Season At Saratoga
Previous: Getting Into The Right Pew

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