Swift's Charity
One cold morning a poor ancient woman sat at the deanery steps a
considerable time, during which the dean saw her through a window, and,
no doubt, commiserated her desolate condition. His footman happened to
go to the door, and the poor creature besought him to give a paper to
his reverence. The servant read it, and told her his master had
something else to do than to mind her petition. What is that you say,
fellow? sa
here directly. The man obeyed him, and was ordered to tell the woman to
come up to him. After bidding her to be seated, he directed some bread
and wine to be given to her; after which, turning round to the man, he
said, At what time did I order you to open and read a paper directed to
me? or to refuse a letter from any one? Hark you, sirrah, you have been
admonished by me for drunkenness, idleness, and other faults; but since
I have discovered your inhuman disposition, I must dismiss you from my
service: so pull off your clothes, take your wages, and let me hear no
more of you.
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On The Same Upright Chief Justice Whitshed
In church your grandsire cut his throat: To do the job too long he tarried, He should have had my hearty vote, To cut his throat before he married. ... Paddy And The Parson
In June, 1832, O'Connell addressed a meeting of the Political Union of the London working classes. In his address, he humorously and graphically describes the system of passive resistance then adopted against the payment of Tithes, in the following ... Preaching Patriotism
Dean Swift is said to have jocularly remarked, that he never preached but twice in his life, and then they were not sermons, but pamphlets. Being asked, upon what subject? he replied, they were against Wood's halfpence. One of these sermons has been... Public Absurdities In Ireland
Among the public absurdities in Ireland, Swift notices the insurance office against fire; the profits of which to the amount of several thousand pounds, were annually remitted to England. For, observes he, as if we could well spare the money, the so... Refusal Of Office
In 1838, on the morning when O'Connell received from the Government the offer to be appointed Lord Chief Baron, he walked over to the window, saying: This is very kind--very kind, indeed!--but I haven't the least notion of taking the offer. Irela... Resolutions When I Come To Be Old
These resolutions seem to be of that kind which are easily formed, and the propriety of which we readily admit at the time we make them, but secretly never design to put them in practice. 1. Not to marry a young woman. 2. Not to keep young comp... Retentive Memory
At Darrynane, he was sitting one morning, surrounded by country people, some asking his advice, some his assistance, others making their grievances known. Amongst the rest was a farmer rather advanced in life, a swaggering sort of fellow, who was de... Roger And The Poultry
There happened, while Swift was at Laracor, the sale of a farm and stock, the farmer being dead. Swift chanced to walk past during the auction just as a pen of poultry had been put up. Roger bid for them, and was overbid by a farmer of the name of H... Roger Cox
What perhaps contributed more than any thing to Swift's enjoyment, was the constant fund of amusement he found in the facetious humor and oddity of the parish clerk, Roger Cox. Roger was originally a hatter in the town of Cavan, trot, being of a liv... Scene At Killiney
O'Connell was a capital actor, and his dramatic delivery of a common remark was often highly impressive. Many years since, he went down to Kingstown, near Dublin, with a party, to visit a queen's ship-of-war, which was then riding in the bay. Aft... Scene Between Fitzgibbon And Curran In The Irish Parliament
Mr. Fitzgibbon (afterwards Lord Clare) rose and said:--The politically insane gentleman has asserted much, but he only emitted some effusions of the witticisms of fancy. His declamation, indeed, was better calculated for the stage of Sadler's Wells ... Short Charity Sermon
The Dean once preached a charity sermon in St. Patrick's Cathedral, Dublin, the length of which disgusted many of his auditors; which, coming to his knowledge, and it falling to his lot soon after to preach another sermon of the like kind in the sam... Singular Event
When Swift was a year old, an event happened to him that seems very unusual; for his nurse, who was a woman of Whitehaven, being under the absolute necessity of seeing one of her relations, who was then extremely sick, and from whom she expected a l... Sir R Peel's Opinion Of O'connell
Sir Robert Peel is said to have expressed his high appreciation of O'Connell's parliamentary abilities. While the Reform Bill was under discussion, the speeches of its friends and foes were one day canvassed at Lady Beauchamp's. On O'Connell's name ... Sow-west And The Wigs
The following humorous scene took place in the Court-house, Green-street, Dublin: The city of Dublin was often contested by Mr. John B. West--a conservative barrister of no ordinary talents, whose early end caused much regret. That gentleman was ... Swift Among The Lawyers
Dean Swift having preached an assize sermon in Ireland, was invited to dine with the Judges; and having in his sermon considered the use and abuse of the law, he then pressed a little hard upon those counsellors, who plead causes which they knew in ... Swift And Bettesworth
Dean Swift having taken a strong dislike to Sergeant Bettesworth, revenged himself by the following lines in one of his poems: So at the bar the booby Bettesworth, Tho' half-a-crown outpays his sweat's worth, Who knows in law nor te... Swift And His Butler
During the publication of the Drapers Letters, Swift was particularly careful to conceal himself from being known as the author. The only persons in the secret, were Robert Blakely, his butler, whom he employed as an amanuensis, and Dr. Sheridan. It... Swift Arbuthnot And Parnell
Swift, Arbuthnot, and Parnell, taking the advantage of a fine frosty morning, set out together upon a walk to a little place which Lord Bathurst had, about eleven miles from London. Swift, remarkable for being an old traveller, and for getting posse... Swift At Thomastown
Dean Swift had heard much of the hospitable festivities of Thomastown, the seat of Mr. Matthew (See Anecdotes of Conviviality), from his friend Dr. Sheridan, who had been often, a welcome guest, both on account of his convivial qualities, and as bei... Swift's Behavior At Table
Swift's manner of entertaining his guests, and his behavior at table, were curious. A frequent visitor thus described them: He placed himself at the head of the table, and opposite to a great pier glass, so that he could see whatever his servants di... Swift's Charity
One cold morning a poor ancient woman sat at the deanery steps a considerable time, during which the dean saw her through a window, and, no doubt, commiserated her desolate condition. His footman happened to go to the door, and the poor creature bes... Swift's Last Lines
In one of those lucid intervals which varied the course of Swift's unhappy lunacy, his guardians or physicians took him out to give him an airing. When they came to the Phoenix park, Swift remarked a new building which he had never seen, and asked w... Swift's Peculiarity Of Humor
Trifles become of some consequence when connected with a great name, or when they throw any light on a distinguished character. Spence thus relates a story told by Pope: Dr. Swift had an odd blunt way that is mistaken by strangers for ill nature. It... Swift's Political Principles
In a letter to Pope, alluding to the days when he took part in politics, he thus expresses himself:-- I had likewise in those days a mortal antipathy to standing armies in times of peace. Because I always took standing armies to be only servants,... Swift's Queer Testimonial To His Servant
Dean Swift, standing one morning at the window of his study, observed a decent old woman offer a paper to one of his servants, which the fellow at first refused in an insolent and surly manner. The woman however pressed her suit with all the energy ... Taxing The Air
Lady Carteret, wife of the Lord Lieutenant, said to Swift, The air of Ireland is very excellent and healthy. For God's sake, madam, said Swift, don't say so in England; for if you do, they will certainly tax it. ... The Closing Scenes Of His Life
The disturbances, says his biographer, by which Ireland was convulsed in 1798 pained O'Leary's mind. The efforts made by the tools of a base faction, to give the tinge of religious fanaticism to the political distractions of that country, excited hi... The Dean And Faulkner
George Faulkner, the Dublin printer, once called on Dean Swift on his return from London, dressed in a rich coat of silk brocade and gold lace, and seeming not a little proud of the adorning of his person: the Dean determined to humble him. When he ... The Dean's Contributory Dinner
Dean Swift once invited to dinner several of the first noblemen and gentlemen in Dublin. A servant announced the dinner, and the Dean led the way to the dining-room. To each chair was a servant, a bottle of wine, a roll, and an inverted plate. On ta... The Feast Of O'rourke
Swift had been heard to say more than once that he should like to pass a few days in the county of Leitrim, as he was told that the native Irish in that part were so obstinately attached to the rude manners of their ancestors, that they could neithe... The Monks Of The Screw
This was the name of a club that met on every Saturday during term in a house in Kevin-street, and had for its members Curran, Grattan, Flood, Father O'Leary, Lord Charlemont, Judge Day, Judge Metge, Judge Chamberlaine, Lord Avonmore, Bowes Daly, Ge... The Pies
Swift, in passing through the county of Cavan, called at a homely but hospitable house, where he knew he should be well received. The Lady Bountiful of the mansion, rejoiced to have so distinguished a guest, runs up to him, and with great eagerness ... The Prince Of Wales
George the Fourth, when Prince of Wales, frequently had as guests at his table Sheridan, Grattan, Curran, Flood, and Father O'Leary. Croly, in his Life of George the Fourth, says--An occasional guest, and a sufficiently singular one, was an Irish Fr... The Scriblerus Club
Before Swift retired to Ireland, Mr. Pope, Dr. Arbuthnot, Mr. Gay, Mr. Parnell, Mr. Jervas, and Swift formed themselves into a society called the Scriblerus Club. They wrote a good many things in conjunction, and, according to Goldsmith, Gay was usu... The Serenading Lover
In the very zenith of Curran's professional career, he was consulted in a case of extremely novel character, which arose out of the following circumstances:-- Not many doors from Eden Quay, in Upper Sackville-street, lived a young lady of very fa... The Three Crosses
Swift in his journeys on foot from Dublin to London, was accustomed to stop for refreshments or rest at the neat little ale-houses at the road's side. One of these, between Dunchurch and Daventry, was formerly distinguished by the sign of the Three ... The Upstart
There was one character which, through life, always kindled Swift's indignation, the haughty, presuming, tyrannizing upstart! A person of this description chanced to reside in the parish of Laracor. Swift omitted no opportunity of humbling his pride... To Quilca
This was a country house of Dr. Sheridan's, where Swift and some of his friends spent a summer in the year 1725, and being in very bad repair, Swift wrote the following lines on the occasion:-- Let me thy properties explain; A rotten cabi... To The Landlord
There hang three crosses at thy door: Hang up thy wife, and she'll make four. ... Trade Of Ireland
Swift being one day at a sheriffs feast, among other toasts the chairman called out, Mr. Dean, the Trade of Ireland. The Dean answered, Sir, I drink no memories. The idea of the answer was evidently taken from Bishop Brown's book against Drinking th... Use Of Red Tape
Curran, when Master of the Rolls, said to Mr. Grattan, You would be the greatest man of your age, Grattan, if you would buy a few yards of red tape, and tie up your bills and papers. ...