A Will And Away
IT was a strange instance of alleged obedience to orders in the case of
a father's will, which a brute of a fellow displayed in turning his
younger brother out-of-doors. He was vociferously remonstrated with by
the neighbors on the gross impropriety of such conduct. Sure, said he,
it's the will; I'm ordered to divide the house betune myself and my
brother, so I've taken the inside and given him the outside.
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A Trump Card
AT one of the Holland-house Sunday dinner-parties, a year or two ago, Crockford's Club, then forming, was talked of; and the noble hostess observed, that the female passion for diamonds was surely less ruinous than the rage for play among men. In sh... A Truth For The Ladies
A LEARNED doctor has given his opinion that tight lacing is a public benefit, inasmuch as it kills off all the foolish girls, and leaves the wise only to grow into women. ... A Typographical Transfer
THE editor of the Evangelical Observer, in reference to a certain person, took occasion to write that he was rectus in ecclesia, i.e., in good standing in the church. The compositor, in the editor's absence, converted it into rectus in culina, which... A Useful Ally
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SIR FRANCIS BLAKE DELAVAL'S death had such an effect on Foote that he burst into tears, retired to his room, and saw no company for two days; the third day, Jewel, his treasurer, calling in upon him, he asked him, with swollen eyes, what time would ... A Vain Threat
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A WELL-KNOWN lawyer, Mr. Marryatt, who declared he had never opened any book after he left school but a law book, once told a jury, when speaking of a chimney on fire: Gentlemen, the chimney took fire; it poured forth volumes of smoke! Volumes, did ... A Walking Stick
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A LOVING husband once waited on a physician to request him to prescribe for his wife's eyes, which were very sore. Let her wash them, said the doctor, every morning with a small glass of brandy. A few weeks after, the doctor chanced to meet the husb... A Wide Difference
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LORD NORTH'S good humor and readiness were of admirable service to him when the invectives of his opponents would have discomforted a graver minister. He frequently indulged in a real or seeming slumber. On one occasion, an opposition debater, suppo... A Wife At Forty
MY notion of a wife at forty, said Jerrold, is, that a man should be able to change her, like a bank-note, for two twenties. ... A Will And Away
IT was a strange instance of alleged obedience to orders in the case of a father's will, which a brute of a fellow displayed in turning his younger brother out-of-doors. He was vociferously remonstrated with by the neighbors on the gross impropriety... A Windy Minister
IN one of our northern counties, a rural district had its harvest operations seriously affected by continuous rains. The crops being much laid, wind was desired in order to restore them to a condition fit for the sickle. A minister, in his Sabbath s... A Winner At Cards
A GENTLEMAN riding one day near Richmond, observed a house delightfully situated, and asking his companion to whom it belonged, was answered, To a card-maker.--Upon my life, he replied, one would imagine all that man's cards must have been trumps. ... A Wise Decision
A GENTLEMAN going to take water at Whitehall stairs, cried out, as he came near the place, Who can swim?--I, master, said forty bawling mouths; when the gentleman observing one slinking away, called after him; but the fellow turning about, said, Sir... A Wise Fool
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SHERIDAN, being on a parliamentary committee, one day entered the room as all the members were seated and ready to commence business. Perceiving no empty seat, he bowed, and looking round the table with a droll expression of countenance, said: Will ... A Woman's Promises
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DOCTOR HILL, a notorious wit, physician, and man of letters, having quarrelled with the members of the Royal Society, who had refused to admit him as an associate, resolved to avenge himself. At the time that Bishop Berkeley had issued his work on t... A Wonderful Sight
A JOLLY Jack-tar having strayed into Atkins's show at Bartholomew Fair, to have a look at the wild beasts, was much struck with the sight of a lion and a tiger in the same den. Why, Jack, said he to a messmate, who was chewing a quid in silent amaze... A Wonderful Woman
WHEN a late Duchess of Bedford was last at Buxton, and then in her eighty-fifth year, it was the medical farce of the day for the faculty to resolve every complaint of whim and caprice into a shock of the nervous system. Her grace, after inquiring o... A Wooden Joke
BURKE said of Lord Thurlow, He was a sturdy oak at Westminster, and a willow at St James's. ... A Woodman
A YOUNG man, boasting of his health and constitutional stamina, was asked to what he chiefly attributed so great a happiness. To laying in a good foundation, to be sure. I make a point, sir, to eat a great deal every morning.--Then I presume, sir, y... A Word In Season
MRS. POWELL the actress was at a court of assize when a young barrister, who rose to make his maiden speech, suddenly stopped short and could not proceed. The lady, feeling for his situation, cried out, as though he had been a young actor on his fir... A Word To The Wise
DR. BALGUY, a preacher of great celebrity, after having preached an excellent discourse at Winchester Cathedral, the text of which was, All wisdom is sorrow, received the following elegant compliment from Dr. Wharton, then at Winchester school:-- ...