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Steam-boat Racing
Jests Home
SIR CHARLES LYELL, when in the United States, received the following
advice from a friend: When you are racing with an opposition
steam-boat, or chasing her, and the other passengers are cheering the
captain, who is sitting on the safety-valve to keep it down with his
weight, go as far as you can from the engine, and lose no time,
especially if you hear the captain exclaim, 'Fire up, boys! put on the
resin!' Should a servant call out, 'Those gentlemen who have not paid
their passage will please to go to the ladies' cabin,' obey the summons
without a moment's delay, for then an explosion may be apprehended. 'Why
to the ladies' cabin?' said I. Because it is the safe end of the boat,
and they are getting anxious for the personal security of those who have
not yet paid their dollars, being, of course, indifferent about the
rest. Therefore never pay in advance; for should you fall overboard
during a race, and the watch cries out to the captain, 'A passenger
overboard,' he will ask, 'Has he paid his passage?' and if he receives
an answer in the affirmative, he will call out 'Go ahead!'
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