After Dinner Speeches
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Kindness goes a long ways lots o' times when it ought t' stay at
An old couple came in from the country, with a big basket of lunch, to
see the circus. The lunch was heavy. The old wife was carrying it. As
they crossed a street, the husband held out his hand and said, "Gimme
that basket, Hannah."
The poor old woman surrendered the basket with a grateful look.
"That's real kind o' ye, Joshua," she quavered.
"Kind!" grunted the old man. "I wuz afeared ye'd git lost."
A fat woman entered a crowded street car and seizing a strap, stood
directly in front of a man seated in the corner. As the car started she
lunged against his newspaper and at the same time trod heavily on his
As soon as he could extricate himself he rose and offered her his seat.
"You are very kind, sir," she said, panting for breath.
"Not at all, madam," he replied; "it's not kindness; it's simply
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