Most Viewed
After Dinner Speeches
Liars
Thin People
Employers And Employees
Courage
Honesty
Forgetfulness
Guests
Faith
Coffee
Least Viewed
Philadelphia
Boston
Imitation
Insurgents
Kultur
Chronology
Cornets
Description
Recall
Senators
|
Umbrellas
Joke Topics Home
A man left his umbrella in the stand in a hotel recently, with a card
bearing the following inscription attached to it: "This umbrella belongs
to a man who can deal a blow of 250 pounds weight. I shall be back in
ten minutes." On returning to seek his property he found in its place a
card thus inscribed: "This card was left here by a man who can run
twelve miles an hour. I shall not be back."
A reputable citizen had left four umbrellas to be repaired. At noon he
had luncheon in a restaurant, and as he was departing he absent-mindedly
started to take an umbrella from a hook near his hat.
"That's mine, sir," said a woman at the next table.
He apologized and went out. When he was going home in a street car with
his four repaired umbrellas, the woman he had seen in the restaurant got
in. She glanced from him to his umbrellas and said:
"I see you had a good day."
"That's a swell umbrella you carry."
"Isn't it?"
"Did you come by it honestly?"
"I haven't quite figured out. It started to rain the other day and I
stepped into a doorway to wait till it stopped. Then I saw a young
fellow coming along with a nice large umbrella, and I thought if he was
going as far as my house I would beg the shelter of his timbershoot. So
I stepped out and asked: 'Where are you going with that umbrella, young
fellow?' and he dropped the umbrella and ran."
One day a man exhibited a handsome umbrella. "It's wonderful how I make
things last," he exclaimed. "Look at this umbrella, now. I bought it
eleven years ago. Since then I had it recovered twice. I had new ribs
put in in 1910, and last month I exchanged it for a new one in a
restaurant. And here it is--as good as new."
Next: VALUE
Previous: TWINS
Viewed 1263
|
Random Joke Topics
Discipline
Making Good
Meekness
Breakfast Foods
Beetles
Constancy
Truth
Missions
Cruelty
Partnership
Commuters
New York City
Office Boys
Sin
Ambition
Laughter
Confessions
Pleasure
Promoting
Stenographers
Promptness
Families
Women's Clubs
Boomerangs
Jury
|
Informational
