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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




A boy who is frequently chastised both by his mother and grandmother speaks of them as a spanking team

Puns Home









A boy who is frequently chastised both by his mother and

grandmother, speaks of them as "a spanking team."











Next: A man aroused his wife from a sound sleep the other night saying that he had seen a ghost in the shape of a donkey

Previous: Castles in the air are walled in by fancy remarked the poet



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Puns

She--you Can't Eat Cake And Keep It
Why Is Miss B---- Wearing Black
What Relation Is A Door-step To A Door-mat
Men Are Deceivers As A Rule
Do You Think The Elevator Boy Stole Your Watch
I Want To Get A Head Of Cabbage Said The Man Who Had Been Sent To Market
Now Comes The Question Which Will Make This Life A Bitter Cup
They Say The Baby Looks Like Me A Circumstance I Dreaded But The Only Likeness I Can See Is That We're Both Bald-headed
We Mustn't Kiss The Baby We Mustn't Kiss The Kid We Mustn't Kiss The Dainty Miss So Scientists Affirm; To Pounce Upon And Wrastle Us There Waits The Awful Bacillus The Sempiternal Most Infernal Omnipresent Germ
She Wants To Be Punctual Always On Time So Carries Her Watch Where She Goes
If You Should Die What Would You Do With Your Body
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He--did You Ever See Anything At So-called Bargain Sales That Was Really Cheap
Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Old Lady (at A Ball Game)--why Do They Call That A Fowl
I Am Told Lynching Is A Pastime In This Section
Kind Lady Remarked The Weary Wayfarer Can You Oblige Me With Something To Eat
Full Many A Coat Tail That Is Long And Wide Does From The Public Gaze Two Monstrous Patches Hide
Are You Intimate With Any Of The Nobility
Is This A Fire Insurance Office
Don't Talk To Me About Compulsory Vaccination
What Do You Think Of The Statement That There Are Three Hundred Haunted Houses In New York
I Had Soup In A Restaurant The Other Day And Found An Oyster In It
Did You Ever Catch Your Husband Flirting
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again