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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




A lady one day being in need of some small change called down-stairs to the cook and enquired: Mary have you any 'coppers' down there

Puns Home









A lady one day being in need of some small change called

down-stairs to the cook and enquired: "Mary, have you any

'coppers' down there?" "Yes, mum, I've two; but if you please,

mum, they're both me cousins," was the unexpected reply.











Next: When I was eating my dinner to-day the butter ran

Previous: --I'm very sorry for that boy



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Puns

I Assured Her I Could Support Her In The Style She Was Accustomed To
When A Man Is Short Of Money He Finds Most Of His Friends Whom He Meets Short-sighted
I Hear They're Going To Change The Name Of Central Park To Orchard Park
Here's An Account Of A Hen Which Layed Three Eggs At Once And Then Died Remarked Mrs
A Watch's Fate Is Hard Indeed For When It's Not In Soak It's Set Back If It Gets Ahead And Scorned Whene'er It's Broke
You Own Your Own House Don't You
Alas For All Their Ecstasy They Knew Not What Was Best: The Young Man Reached The Front Door The Old Man Did The Rest
Only The Highest Element In Local Society Was Invited To The Ball
My Friend Said The Long-coated Old Man Solemnly Have You Made Preparation For The Day Of Judgment
You Should Sleep On Your Right Side Madam
We're All Often Forced To Rob Peter In Order To Settle With Paul But Some Of Us Merely Rob Peter And Paul Never Sees Us At All
Why Do You Call That Colored Man A Blackmailer
Do You Believe In Luck
Brown--i Hear That They Use All Sorts Of Materials In The Manufacture Of Illuminating Gas Nowadays
There Was A Terrible Murder In The Hotel To-day
A Man Who Had Not The Best Reputation For Strict Veracity Died The Other Day And The Family Was Greatly Incensed Because Some Well-meaning Friends Sent In A Broken Lyre As A Floral Tribute
There Is But One Thing Said The Professor Of Medicine Gravely That We Know About Death
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Lady (after The Tramp Finishes Eating)--it's Merely A Suggestion--the Woodpile Is In The Back Yard
A Painter Who Fell Off A Scaffold With A Pot Of Paint In Each Hand Said: Well I Came Down With Flying Colors Anyhow
I Hear They Are Trying To Close Up The Gambling Establishments In New York
A Boil In The Pot Is Worth Two On The Neck
There Is A Man Who Never Knew Such A Thing As Fear
The First Kiss Only Comes Once In A Lifetime
Jones Caught The Hay Fever From Dancing With A Grass Widow