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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




I saw your sister on the street to-day

Puns Home









"I saw your sister on the street to-day."



"How was she looking?"



"I don't know. I didn't see her face."



"How did you know it was my sister?"



"Oh, I'm quick at figures."











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Puns

Husband--that Ice Box Of Ours Reminds Me Of A Good Pinochle Player
I Wonder What The Holes In A Porous Plaster Are For
A Man With The Heart Disease Is About The Only Chap Who Desires A Regular Beat For A Bosom Friend
Yes He's Got A Flying-machine Ready For A Trial Now And He's Trying Hard Not To Be Proud
First Doctor--well Doctor I Had A Peculiar Case To-day
I Sent A Dollar Last Week Said The Good Thing In Answer To That Advertisement Offering A Method Of Saving One-half My Gas Bills
In This Glorious Land Of The Free You Always Have To Pay For The Drinks In Order To Get A Whack At The Free Lunch
Customer--why Do You Call This Electric Cake
Pat And Mike Each Wanted To Be First Up On St
What Do You Think Of The Statement That There Are Three Hundred Haunted Houses In New York
I Don't Think My Religion Will Be Any Obstacle To Your Church He Urged; I Am A Spiritualist
Personal--'a Young Woman To Whom Black Is Particularly Becoming Would Like To Meet A Gentleman In Poor Health; Object Widowhood
How About The Lazy Man Who Hurt His Eye Looking For Work
What Is Love
Are You Intimate With Any Of The Nobility
Condon--have You Been Cured Of That Last Attack Of Malaria
What Relation Is A Door-step To A Door-mat
Yes Dear Said The Petted Young Wife Examining Her Christmas Gift These Diamond Earrings Are Pretty But The Stones Are Awfully Small
The Landlord Came To Mrs
The Old Lady Who Sent As Presents To A Newly-married Couple A Rolling-pin A Pain Of Flat-irons And A Motto Inscribed Fight On Must Have A Grudge Against Them
I Had Soup In A Restaurant The Other Day And Found An Oyster In It
That Man Has Had Five Wives
A Painter Who Fell Off A Scaffold With A Pot Of Paint In Each Hand Said: Well I Came Down With Flying Colors Anyhow
Some Of Us Have More Ups And Downs In This World Than Others But When We Get To The Cemetery We Will All Be On The Dead Level
Where Did You Get That Hair On Your Coat