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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Ah
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




I say old chap how short your overcoat is

Puns Home











"I say, old chap, how short your overcoat is!"



"Oh, that's all right! It'll be long enough before I can afford a

new one."











Next: PAT--'Twas the divil of a blow the dago gave yer

Previous: FRED--I had a fall last night which rendered me unconscious for several hours



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Puns

--i Want To Be An Angel
An Art-school Student Recently Painted The Picture Of A Dog Under A Tree So Lifelike That It Was Impossible To Distinguish The Bark Of The Tree From That Of The Dog
Nature Never Allows Anything To Run To Waist
He Kissed Her On The Cheek; It Seemed A Harmless Frolic; He's Been Laid Up A Week-- They Say With Painter's Colic
She--you Used To Call Me The Light Of Your Life
Full Many A Coat Tail That Is Long And Wide Does From The Public Gaze Two Monstrous Patches Hide
There's A Young Woman Who Makes Little Things Count
Do You Believe In Transmigration Of Souls
Anything New In Your Neighborhood
This Is An Interesting Clock Miss Said The Salesman You Really Should Have One Especially If You're Bothered With Tiresome Callers
Algy--charming Widow Isn't She
He Said To Her: You're Just A Bird
The Doctor--you Regard Society As Merely A Machine Do You
How Did You Cure Your Boy Of Swearing
No Indeed She Said I Can Never Be Your Wife
I See Villainy In Your Face Said A Judge To A Prisoner
Jack--are You A Suitor For Miss Juliet's Hand
And You Really Think That A Miss Is As Good As A Mile
Pa Said Little Williewho Had Been Reading A Treatise On
Stranger--boy Can You Direct Me To The Bank
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
Actor Friend (inquiring At Boarding House)--has Mr
I Asked A Young Lady Living On Her Pa's Farm What They Did With All Their Fruit
How Did That Fight Between The Bridge Tenders End
Yeast--did You Ever Try To Dye Eggs