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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Ah
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




If tough spells tough

Puns Home










If t-o-u-g-h spells tough,

And d-o-u-g-h spells dough,

Does s-n-o-u-g-h spell snuff?

Or, simply snow?











Next: THE WIFE (savagely)--Don't let me catch you flirting

Previous: Dearest whispered Cordelia after she had captured the coveted solitaire I have a confession to make



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Puns

What's The Matter With Smith
Where Are You Going My Pretty Maid
Some Of Us Have More Ups And Downs In This World Than Others But When We Get To The Cemetery We Will All Be On The Dead Level
Medium--do You Believe In Spirits
Yes Said A Landlord Sadly Whose Tenant Had Made A Moonlight Flitting Appearances Are Deceitful; But Disappearances Are Still More So
Why Does A Donkey Eat Thistles
Sibly--when Steve Proposed To Me He Acted Like A Fish Out Of Water
I Saw A Sign In A Hardware Store To-day 'cast Iron Sinks
You Never Bought A Gold Brick Did You
The Street Car Lurched
Miss Prim Is A Very Proper Young Lady
Visitor--oh What A Nice Parrot You've Got
We Don't Always Know Just How The Other Half Lives; But In Chicago The Better Half Lives On Her Alimony
They Say The Baby Looks Like Me A Circumstance I Dreaded But The Only Likeness I Can See Is That We're Both Bald-headed
He Called Her An Angel Before They Were Wed But That Alas
The Modern Drummer Is Not Much Like The Month Of March
What A Distinguished Looking Man
Massachusetts Is Noted For Boots And Shoes
There's One Peculiar Feature About The Trust Business
A Recent School Examination In England Elicited The Following Definitions: Noah's Wife Wrote One Boy Was Called Joan Of Arc
A Bashful Young Couple Who Were Evidently Very Much In Love Entered A Crowded Street Car In Boston The Other Day
Why Do You Call Your Dog Hardware
Seven Little Missionaries-- Horrible Their Fate-- Cannibals Picked Clean Their Bones Then They Were Ate
Don't Pen Missives To Your Best Girl On Postal Cards
Harold Began His Wife