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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best
Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men
I Can't Say But This I Protest
All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder
Luck Than You
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Mrs
How Are You To-day
Ah
Why Do You Call Your Dog Hardware
Special Rules For Guests
Customer (to The Coal Dealer): Have You Got Any Name For Those
Scales Of Yours
Least Viewed
What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere
Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe
We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later
We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay
It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say--
A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say;
But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush
For When We Have A Debt To Pay
To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie
Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark
So His Wife Did Remark
And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man
And Fond Of Whisky Plain
But When He Joined The Temperance Club
He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye
And Vicious Tools He Hacks With
He's Clever But I've Come To Think
He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws
That I Ever Saw Saw
I Never Saw A Saw
Saw Like This Saw Saws
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Jonah's experience with the whale is proof that you can't keep a
good man down
Puns Home
Jonah's experience with the whale is proof that you can't keep a
good man down.
Next: Since I've been married I don't get half enough to eat Previous: MRS
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Puns
He Used To Send Her Roses;
He Sent Them Every Hour
But Now They're Married And He Sends
Her Home A Cauliflower
I Saw A Big Rat In My Cook-stove And When I Went For My Revolver
He Ran Out
He Dined Not Wisely But Too Well--
Hence All His Ills;
And Nothing Now Agrees With Him
Excepting Pills
Did The Minister Say Anything Comforting
She--they Say That Your Father Is A Millionaire
An Irishman Just Landed Seeing An Electric-motor Car Running
For The First Time Exclaimed: Well Well Ould Nick Must Be
Pullin' It Wid A String
Telephone Operators Are Always Bound To Have The Last Word;
That's Why Females Are Always Employed In That Capacity
Mrs
Coleridge Who Was A Bad Rider Was Accosted When On Horseback By
A Wag Who Asked Him If He Knew What Happened To Balaam The
Same Thing That Happened To Me--an Ass Spoke To Him
He--i Saw You Out Driving Yesterday With A Gentleman
These Verses Make No Sense Said She;
I Can't Tell What They Mean
Fred--did You Hear Of The Western Furniture Co
A Man With The Heart Disease Is About The Only Chap Who Desires A
Regular Beat For A Bosom Friend
How To Signal A Bark--pull A Dog's Tail
Seven Little Missionaries--
Horrible Their Fate--
Cannibals Picked Clean Their Bones
Then They Were Ate
Wife-will You See That My Grave Is Kept Green My Darling
I Understand That Willoughby Was Half Seas Over At The Sneerwell
Dinner
This Murmured The Demure Maiden When Her Lover Nudged Up
Still Closer On The Sofa Is The Closest Call I've Ever Had
A Man Who Had Not The Best Reputation For Strict Veracity Died
The Other Day And The Family Was Greatly Incensed Because Some
Well-meaning Friends Sent In A Broken Lyre As A Floral Tribute
I Got Your Fare Didn't I
Mrs
To-morrow Never Comes They Say;
But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush
For When We Have A Debt To Pay
To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Pat Said One Catholic Friend To Another
Actor Friend (inquiring At Boarding House)--has Mr
What Do You Think Of Windig
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