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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




Lady (after the tramp finishes eating)--It's merely a suggestion--the woodpile is in the back yard

Puns Home









Lady (after the tramp finishes eating)--It's merely a

suggestion--the woodpile is in the back yard.



Tramp--You don't say! What a splendid place for a woodpile!











Next: Said she How beautiful is nature

Previous: Kind lady remarked the weary wayfarer can you oblige me with something to eat



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Puns

Guard--i Suppose When You Were In The Army You Often Saw A Picket Fence
The Girl Who Marries A Title Very Frequently Turns Her Fortune To A Count
A Prominent Man Called To Condone With A Lady On The Death Of Her Husband And Concluded By Saying Did He Leave You Much
He Dined Not Wisely But Too Well-- Hence All His Ills; And Nothing Now Agrees With Him Excepting Pills
What Is There About Betting On Horse-races That Is So Bad For The Health
You Treat Me Cried Mrs
According To A Florist's Magazine Jacks Are Becoming Cheap
After A Man Has Had Occasion To Employ A First-class Lawyer It Is Useless To Tell Him That Talk Is Cheap
I Wonder Why Blondes Are Always Anxious To Be Wedded
There's A Young Woman Who Makes Little Things Count
I Wouldn't Stand For That If I Were You
What Is Love
She--i Think This A Lovely Hat You Bought Me George But Really It's A Sin To Pay $50
She--you Can't Eat Cake And Keep It
A Squall On The Sea Is A Stress Of Weather And A Squaller On Land Is A Songstress
There Is But One Thing Said The Professor Of Medicine Gravely That We Know About Death
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
Coleridge Who Was A Bad Rider Was Accosted When On Horseback By A Wag Who Asked Him If He Knew What Happened To Balaam The Same Thing That Happened To Me--an Ass Spoke To Him
Lovett--you Don't Believe In Divorce Then
Merchant (to His Confidential Clerk)--here's A Letter From Mr
That Was A Pretty Good Dog Story Wasn't It
I Hate A Liar Wiggins Cried Said Jiggins Then 'twould Seem You Really Ought To Try And Hide Your Lack Of Self-esteem
Why Should A Young Man Never Raise His Straw Hat To A Lady
Sing Not To Me Of Falling Dew Upon The Purple Hills For I Am Worried Far Too Much By Falling Due Of Bills
He--then I Am To Understand That You Have Given Me The Mitten As It Were