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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




MASHINGTON--What's the matter with your clock

Puns Home









MASHINGTON--What's the matter with your clock? It's stopped.



TAILOR--I never wind it up. I use it as a motto.



"What do you mean?"



"No tick here."











Next: The hawk was dozing

Previous: What kind of essence does a young man like when he pops the question



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Puns

At A West End Hotel One Of The Party Asked: Have You Got Any Celery Waiter
My Sister Had A Fright Yesterday
One Day In The Dining-car The Boy Across The Aisle Got To Laughing So He Couldn't Stop
Some One Threw A Head Of Cabbage At An Irish Orator While He Was Making A Speech Once
I Don't Think My Religion Will Be Any Obstacle To Your Church He Urged; I Am A Spiritualist
Old Jones Was Killed Last Night By A Dew-drop
A Mechanic His Labor Will Often Discard
I Wish The Hot Weather Would Come Along Sighed The Thermometer
I Am Told Said She Saucily That Though You Are A Military Man You Are Afraid Of Powder
How Did That Fight Between The Bridge Tenders End
Why Do All Bank Cashiers Run To Canada
Bacon--what's That Thread Tied About Your Little Finger For
He--time And Tide Wait For No Man
She Thinks That Her Husband Is Very Economical
I Saw Your Sister On The Street To-day
Mrs
Every Time I Get On A Ferry Boat It Makes Me Cross
She Heard The Fog-horn Blowing And What Is That
Were You Attached To The Place
According To A Florist's Magazine Jacks Are Becoming Cheap
He--i Saw You Out Driving Yesterday With A Gentleman
What I Like About The Irish Is That They Are So Modest And Unassuming
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
--when Mrs
Here's An Account Of A Hen Which Layed Three Eggs At Once And Then Died Remarked Mrs