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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




PETERS--Are you not sick of hearing everybody sing that popular song

Puns Home









PETERS--"Are you not sick of hearing everybody sing that popular

song?"



WINKLE--"Not I."



PETERS--"Heavens! How can you stand it?"



WINKLE-"I wrote the song."











Next: I'm the champion long distance cornet player

Previous: An Irishman quarreling with an Englishman told him if he didn't hold his tongue he would break his impenetrable head and let his brains out of his empty skull



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Puns

Now Why Remarked The Little Dog In Speaking To The Tree Would You Say That The Heart Of You Is Like The Tail Of Me
Yeast--did You Ever Try To Dye Eggs
The Fate Of Lot's Wife Was All Her Own Fault; She First Turned To Rubber And Then Turned To Salt
Bill Had A Billboard
Miss Prim Is A Very Proper Young Lady
Alas For All Their Ecstasy They Knew Not What Was Best: The Young Man Reached The Front Door The Old Man Did The Rest
Judge--you Are Charged With Profanity
You Own Your Own House Don't You
Yankee--i Say Britisher Can You Spell Horse
Me Eyes Is Crossed Sighed Kate
Two Hebrews Went To A Mills Hotel And Were Obliged To Take A Bath Before Retiring
A Frankfort Man Has Written A Farce Comedy Called Vaccine
George You Look Exhausted She Said To Him As He Was Putting On His Hat And Coat
He Used To Send Her Roses; He Sent Them Every Hour But Now They're Married And He Sends Her Home A Cauliflower
The Hawk Was Dozing
When Lot Found His Wife Transformed Into A Pillar Of Salt He Was Wise Enough To Let It Go At That And Not Take A Fresh One
How Did You Cure Your Boy Of Swearing
There Is A Man Who Never Knew Such A Thing As Fear
Where Are You Working Now
He--didn't You Promise To Love Honor And Obey Me
A Squall On The Sea Is A Stress Of Weather And A Squaller On Land Is A Songstress
Girls And Billiard Balls Kiss Each Other With Just About The Same Amount Of Real Feeling
What Became Of That Girl You Made Love To In The Hammock
Customer: You Have A Sign In Your Window 'a Suit Of Clothes Made While You Wait
Scene--cabstand