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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




Say did you ever feel as if you wanted to 'hit the pipe

Puns Home











"Say, did you ever feel as if you wanted to 'hit the pipe?'"



"No, but I've often felt as if I wanted to hit the man who was

smoking it."











Next: It was this a-way jedge: Ye see I doled de cards and Jim Brown he had a pah of aces and a pah of kings

Previous: In choosing a wife said the scanty-haired philosopher one should never judge by appearances



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Puns

Some Men Divide Their Lives Between Trying To Forget And Trying To Recover From The Effects Of Trying To Forget
And You Really Think That A Miss Is As Good As A Mile
Have You Ever Met My Sister Louisa
I Saw De Castro The Magician Make A $20 Gold Piece Disappear In Three Minutes
Mike--yus Poor Sullivan Is Dead
A Teacher In A High School Asked A Little Wad Of An Irish Boy To Describe A Lake
Only Tells Half
This Murmured The Demure Maiden When Her Lover Nudged Up Still Closer On The Sofa Is The Closest Call I've Ever Had
She Thinks That Her Husband Is Very Economical
Me Eyes Is Crossed Sighed Kate
A Boston Man Upon Learning That There Were 4000 Poles In New York Exclaimed: What A Place To Raise Beans
A Husband And Wife Are Considered One But It Is Useless To Try To Work That Gag On The Landlord When He Presents The Board Bill
I Wouldn't Stand For That If I Were You
Mary Had A Little Lamb But She Thought It Was Immense: With New Green Peas And Other Things It Cost Her Ninety Cents
After A Man Has Had Occasion To Employ A First-class Lawyer It Is Useless To Tell Him That Talk Is Cheap
Let Me See Said The Minister
Telephone Operators Are Always Bound To Have The Last Word; That's Why Females Are Always Employed In That Capacity
Said She How Beautiful Is Nature
Fannie--why Do People Always Apply The Name Of She To A City
We're All Often Forced To Rob Peter In Order To Settle With Paul But Some Of Us Merely Rob Peter And Paul Never Sees Us At All
The Man Who Was Run Over By The Cars The Other Day Is Now Out Of Danger
Each Evening A Good-looking Mr
A Man Wanted A Ticket To New York And Only Had A $2 Bill
I Hate A Liar Wiggins Cried Said Jiggins Then 'twould Seem You Really Ought To Try And Hide Your Lack Of Self-esteem
He--don't You Think Miss Plainly Is The Very Image Of Her Mother