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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




Some men are easily satisfied remarked the Observer of Events and Things

Puns Home









"Some men are easily satisfied," remarked the Observer of Events

and Things. "There is the clock-maker, for instance, he never

gets any extra pay, and yet every day he works overtime."











Next: A poacher surprised at his work and pursued in his escape by a vengefully thrown axe remarked as he vaulted a fence: I have no fault to find with your remarks but I object to the axe-sent

Previous: The glazier is not necessarily a tiresome man because he gives you a pane



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Puns

Smith--they Say That After A Time The Engineer Of A Limited Flyer Loses His Nerve
An Emblem Of Tenuity We Witness Every Day; Behold The Corset-and You'll See The Whale-bone Comes To Stay
What A Fearful Night I Had When I Drew This Gun The First Time
The Wife (savagely)--don't Let Me Catch You Flirting
We Mustn't Kiss The Baby We Mustn't Kiss The Kid We Mustn't Kiss The Dainty Miss So Scientists Affirm; To Pounce Upon And Wrastle Us There Waits The Awful Bacillus The Sempiternal Most Infernal Omnipresent Germ
How Could You Endure Talking So Long With That Ugly Old Woman With That Frightful Costume Without Laughing In Her Face
Her Face Was Happy His Face Was Stern; Her Hand Was In His'n His'n Was In Her'n
How Did You Cure Your Boy Of Swearing
The Modern Drummer Is Not Much Like The Month Of March
Ah
Condon--have You Been Cured Of That Last Attack Of Malaria
The Detective At The Boarding House Table Having Satisfied Himself That Nobody Had Observed Him Folded Up His Magnifying Glass And Put It Back In His Pocket
Girls And Billiard Balls Kiss Each Other With Just About The Same Amount Of Real Feeling
A Sporty Young Fellow Named Phipps Last Night Went To View The Eclipse
An Irishman Wandering Up Fifth Avenue Saw In The Window Of A Photographer's Shop A Large Photograph Of Mephisto
A Boil In The Pot Is Worth Two On The Neck
The Old Lady Who Sent As Presents To A Newly-married Couple A Rolling-pin A Pain Of Flat-irons And A Motto Inscribed Fight On Must Have A Grudge Against Them
He--yes She Is Living Under An Assumed Name
Soloman Soloman--our Frent Cohen Must Pe Goin' T' Haf A Fire
She--a Writer Says That In Order To Succeed A Man Must Be Ninety-five Per Cent
Lady (after The Tramp Finishes Eating)--it's Merely A Suggestion--the Woodpile Is In The Back Yard
Pat Said One Catholic Friend To Another
You Should Sleep On Your Right Side Madam
Now Comes The Question Which Will Make This Life A Bitter Cup
He's A Professional Grafter