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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
How Are You To-day

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What's The Matter Here
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws


Puns Home


1--Guests are requested not to speak to the dumb waiter.

2--Guests wishing to get up without being called can have

self-raising flour for supper.

3--The hotel is supported by a beautiful cemetery; hearses to

hire, 25c. a day.

4--Guests wishing to do a little driving will find a hammer and

nails in the closet.

5--If the room gets too warm, open the window and see the fire


6--If you're fond of athletics and like good jumping, lift the

mattress and see the bed spring.

7--If your lamp goes out, take a feather out of the pillow; that's

light enough for any room.

8--Any one troubled with nightmare will find a halter on the


9--Don't worry about paying your bill; the house is supported by

the foundation.

J. WISE, Prop.

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Did You Hear The Story About The Peacock
Fred--i Had A Fall Last Night Which Rendered Me Unconscious For Several Hours
Moses Schaumburg (to His Son Jackey)--how Many Are Twice Two Jackey
Did You Go Into Any Of The New York Restaurants
Jones Caught The Hay Fever From Dancing With A Grass Widow
She--they Say The Eyes Are The Windows Of The Soul I Believe
When Was Money First Invented
Don't Take A Bull By The Horns; Take Him By The Tail Then You Can Let Go Without Getting Some One To Help You
You Ought To Sleep Well, You Lie So Easily
My Dear What Makes You Always Yawn
He Kissed Her On The Cheek; It Seemed A Harmless Frolic; He's Been Laid Up A Week-- They Say With Painter's Colic
Swatter--i See You Are Mentioned In One Of The Books Just Published
A Husband And Wife Are Considered One But It Is Useless To Try To Work That Gag On The Landlord When He Presents The Board Bill
You Own Your Own House Don't You
Yankee--i Say Britisher Can You Spell Horse
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Pressed For Work--cider
You Should Sleep On Your Right Side Madam
--i'm Very Sorry For That Boy
Tom--i Kissed Her When She Wasn't Looking
Girls And Billiard Balls Kiss Each Other With Just About The Same Amount Of Real Feeling
Your Father Has A Strong Box At Home Hasn't He Willie Said The Teacher
She--i Think This A Lovely Hat You Bought Me George But Really It's A Sin To Pay $50
--that Jersey Murderer Was Clever To Get Off As He Did Wasn't He
My Sister Had A Fright Yesterday