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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




The impecunious young man who marries a girl with a substantial check attached may very properly be said to have been checkmated

Puns Home









The impecunious young man who marries a girl with a substantial

check attached may very properly be said to have been checkmated.











Next: VISITOR--I suppose you have a great deal of poetry sent into you for publication

Previous: There are many sweet entrancing moments in this life but when a man steps on your pet corn you do not experience one of them



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Puns

Don't Pen Missives To Your Best Girl On Postal Cards
Dame Rumor Ought Frequently To Have Her Named Spelled Without The E
Some People Who Jump At Conclusions Lose Sight Of The Hurdles
He--yes She Is Living Under An Assumed Name
If You Want To See A Strong Organization Look At The Whisky Dealers; If You Want To See A Weak One Look At The Consumers
Where Are You Going My Pretty Maid
A Lady Noticed A Boy Sprinkling Salt On The Sidewalk To Take Off The Ice And Remarked To A Friend Pointing To The Salt: Now That's True Benevolence
It Was This A-way Jedge: Ye See I Doled De Cards And Jim Brown He Had A Pah Of Aces And A Pah Of Kings
I Saw De Castro The Magician Make A $20 Gold Piece Disappear In Three Minutes
The Only Remedy--mamma I Dess You'll Have To Turn The Hose On Me
When The Curtain At The Theater Takes A Drop The Majority Of The Males In The Audience Go Out To Follow Suit
Moses--how Did You Make Your Money Ike
I'll Never Ask Another Woman To Marry Me As Long As I Live
You Know Fatty Schultz The Butcher
Take Away My First Letter Take Away My Second Letter Take Away All My Letters And I Am Still The Same
What Must A Man Be That He Shall Be Buried With Military Honors
The First Kiss Only Comes Once In A Lifetime
I'd Like To See Your Mistress
The Rapidity Of Ocean Transport Is Becoming Truly Marvelous
He Has None Of The Finer Sensibilities Nothing To Distinguish Him From The Common Herd
First Doctor--well Doctor I Had A Peculiar Case To-day
Greene--these Wakes Of Yours Are Pretty Boisterous Affairs Sometimes
Corbett And Fitzsimmons Will Never Fight Again
He--i Saw You Out Driving Yesterday With A Gentleman
Algy--charming Widow Isn't She