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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Ah
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




The weary desert stretched for miles

Puns Home











The weary desert stretched for miles. Stretched for sheer

weariness. Not a drop of water was in sight.



Then it was that the traveler had an inspiration.



He wrung his hands.











Next: Corbett and Fitzsimmons will never fight again

Previous: I've been married five years and I've got a bushel of children



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Puns

According To A Florist's Magazine Jacks Are Becoming Cheap
He--the Bride Looks Radiant As Brides Usually Do
Nature Never Allows Anything To Run To Waist
The Stork Is A Bird With A Great Big Bill; He Brings Us The Babies Whenever He Will; Then Comes The Doctor And When He Is Through You Find That He Has A Big Bill Too
What Is The Secret Of Success
George--i Can't Understand Why My Girl Shook Me
Coleridge Who Was A Bad Rider Was Accosted When On Horseback By A Wag Who Asked Him If He Knew What Happened To Balaam The Same Thing That Happened To Me--an Ass Spoke To Him
A Painter Who Fell Off A Scaffold With A Pot Of Paint In Each Hand Said: Well I Came Down With Flying Colors Anyhow
Teacher Of Drawing Class--willie Tell Me How You Would Make A Maltese Cross
--that Jersey Murderer Was Clever To Get Off As He Did Wasn't He
Cleverton--miss Cutler Tells Me She Has Been Putting Quinine On Her Face Lately For Her Complexion
She--i Think This A Lovely Hat You Bought Me George But Really It's A Sin To Pay $50
Seven Little Missionaries-- Horrible Their Fate-- Cannibals Picked Clean Their Bones Then They Were Ate
Student--professor Which Is The Logical Way Of Reaching A Conclusion
Irish Stew Said The Restaurant Guest
A Butcher Knows How To Make Both Ends Meet
Yankee--i Say Britisher Can You Spell Horse
Cityman--do They Keep A Servant Girl
For Years She'd Heard Her Husband Sadly Say: Can't We Have Pies Like Mother Used To Bake
What Have You Here
Yes I Have Seen The Day When Mr
For Mercy Sake Don't Put Me Near Old Billions
It Was This A-way Jedge: Ye See I Doled De Cards And Jim Brown He Had A Pah Of Aces And A Pah Of Kings
Visitor--oh What A Nice Parrot You've Got
There Are Many Sweet Entrancing Moments In This Life But When A Man Steps On Your Pet Corn You Do Not Experience One Of Them