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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Ah
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
Electricity Is A Great Educator
How Are You To-day


Least Viewed

What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




Things are wrong remarked the observer of events and things when a reputable physician has to pay money for a certificate to practice and a fourteen-year-old girl with a new piano doesn't

Puns Home









"Things are wrong," remarked the observer of events and things,

"when a reputable physician has to pay money for a certificate to

practice, and a fourteen-year-old girl with a new piano doesn't."











Next: In choosing a wife said the scanty-haired philosopher one should never judge by appearances

Previous: Why is a kiss like the three graces



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Viewed 1931



Puns

You Should Sleep On Your Right Side Madam
A Bashful Young Couple Who Were Evidently Very Much In Love Entered A Crowded Street Car In Boston The Other Day
Cholly--ethel Knox Told Me Last Night I Wasn't Over Half-witted
When You See A Young Man Cleaning A Girl's Bicycle They Are Engaged; But When You See The Operation Reversed They Are Married
Have You Much Room In Your New Flat
As He Walked With Baby He Had To Confess That Marriage With Him Was A Howling Success
I'm Not Surprised That Hair-dressers Feel So Much At Ease In The Society Of The Great
Bacon--what's That Thread Tied About Your Little Finger For
He Said To Her: You're Just A Bird
Dearest Whispered Cordelia After She Had Captured The Coveted Solitaire I Have A Confession To Make
The House A Lawyer Once Enjoy'd
You Want A Divorce From Your Wife Do You
Tomdick--i'd Like To Find Some Girl Willing To Marry Me
Yes He's Got A Flying-machine Ready For A Trial Now And He's Trying Hard Not To Be Proud
He Always Kneeled Before The Maid And Kissed Her Finger Tips; But He Lost Out
Business Men Who Marry Their Typewriter Girls Are Apt To Find That The Young Women Are Not So Ready To Submit To Dictation After The Wedding
Do You Go To Church To Hear The Sermon Or The Music Maude
Do You Think The Things One Eats Have A Direct Effect On One's Disposition
If I Might Hold That Hand Again
I Once Knew A Man Who With The Aid Of A Microscope Made A Harness For A Flea
With Cards And Dice And Dress And Friends My Savings Are Complete; I Light The Candle At Both Ends And Thus Make Both Ends Meet
Boss Hab You Got Any Ob Dem Confound Cavortic Pills
Why Did You Insist On Only $99000 A Year As Your Salary
'tis Now The Wily Urchin Mocks The Lynx-eyed Cop Along The Docks And Plunges In The Cooling Tide Arrayed In Naught Else But His Hide
I Saw Some Delicious Apples Growing On A Tree This Morning