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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




This liver is awful Maud said Mr

Puns Home











"This liver is awful, Maud," said Mr. Newwed.



"I'm very sorry," returned the bride, "I'll tell the cook to

speak to the livery-man about it."











Next: Who was the first one that came from the ark when it landed

Previous: It doesn't do any good to scold the janitor about our cold rooms



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Puns

There Was A Terrible Murder In The Hotel To-day
Cityman--do They Keep A Servant Girl
Moses Schaumburg (to His Son Jackey)--how Many Are Twice Two Jackey
The Rubber Plant Was Rubb'ring Round In A Manner Most Absurd: The Long Green Corn Prickled Up Her Ears And This Is What She Heard: Wot's Tomato Wid You You Beat
Tommy--pa Did You Really Mean It When You Said You'd Spank Anyone That Broke That Vase
Every Time I Get On A Ferry Boat It Makes Me Cross
A Man Who Had Not The Best Reputation For Strict Veracity Died The Other Day And The Family Was Greatly Incensed Because Some Well-meaning Friends Sent In A Broken Lyre As A Floral Tribute
Two Wrongs Don't Make A Right
So You Were Bound And Gagged By Bandits While In Italy Were You
A Lady Noticed A Boy Sprinkling Salt On The Sidewalk To Take Off The Ice And Remarked To A Friend Pointing To The Salt: Now That's True Benevolence
Guest--what Have You Got
Brown--i Hear That They Use All Sorts Of Materials In The Manufacture Of Illuminating Gas Nowadays
Askit-what Is A Convenient Fall Trip For Me To Take
Irish Stew Said The Restaurant Guest
There Is A Man Who Never Knew Such A Thing As Fear
No Indeed She Said I Can Never Be Your Wife
Jenks--why On Earth Did You Laugh So Heartily At That Ancient Jest Of Borem's
Young Ladies Who Feel Anxious To Preserve The Most Symmetrical Anatomical Proportions Should Never Be In A Hurry
Condon--have You Been Cured Of That Last Attack Of Malaria
If Tough Spells Tough
Why The Bare Idea
Customer: You Have A Sign In Your Window 'a Suit Of Clothes Made While You Wait
Mrs
A Certain Young Man Told His Girl The Other Night That If She Didn't Marry Him He'd Get A Rope And Hang Himself Right In Front Of Her Home
When Were Walking-sticks First Invented