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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




TOMMY--Pa did you really mean it when you said you'd spank anyone that broke that vase

Puns Home











TOMMY--Pa, did you really mean it when you said you'd spank

anyone that broke that vase?



PA--Just come here, sir, and I'll show you.



TOMMY--Don't show me. Show Bridget; she just broke it.











Next: Here lies poor Sam: and what is strange Grim death has worked in him a change---- He always lied and always will He once lied loud and now lies still

Previous: Bill had a billboard



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Puns

For Years She'd Heard Her Husband Sadly Say: Can't We Have Pies Like Mother Used To Bake
Yankee--i Say Britisher Can You Spell Horse
Condon--have You Been Cured Of That Last Attack Of Malaria
For Mercy Sake Don't Put Me Near Old Billions
Newlywed-what Do Bachelors Know About Women
You Know Fatty Schultz The Butcher
Haven't I Told You Before He Cried To Sing Out The Names Of Stations Clearly And Distinctly
Student--professor Which Is The Logical Way Of Reaching A Conclusion
Moses--how Did You Make Your Money Ike
What Is The Meaning Of The Saying That A Man Shall Earn His Bread In The Sweat Of His Brow
A Boy Who Is Frequently Chastised Both By His Mother And Grandmother Speaks Of Them As A Spanking Team
An Irishman Comes To This Country Remains Here Ten Years And Goes Back To Ireland And Dies
Johnnie--ya-as I've Just Come Back From Ireland--county Cork
What Do You Think Of The Statement That There Are Three Hundred Haunted Houses In New York
I've Been Pondering Over A Very Singular Thing
What Must A Man Be That He Shall Be Buried With Military Honors
'tis Now The Wily Urchin Mocks The Lynx-eyed Cop Along The Docks And Plunges In The Cooling Tide Arrayed In Naught Else But His Hide
Have You Ever Met My Sister Louisa
Good Gracious Said The Hen When She Discovered A Porcelain Egg On The Nest
Teacher--johnny Can You Tell Me What A Section Boss Is
An Old Lady, Being Told That A Certain Lawyer Was Lying
He--then I Am To Understand That You Have Given Me The Mitten As It Were
I've Been Married Five Years And I've Got A Bushel Of Children
Visitor--oh What A Nice Parrot You've Got
We Are Told That Gen