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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Electricity Is A Great Educator
How Are You To-day

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What's The Matter Here
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws

We mustn't kiss the baby we mustn't kiss the kid We mustn't kiss the dainty miss so scientists affirm; To pounce upon and wrastle us there waits the awful bacillus The sempiternal most infernal omnipresent germ

Puns Home

We mustn't kiss the baby, we mustn't kiss the kid,

We mustn't kiss the dainty miss, so scientists affirm;

To pounce upon and "wrastle" us there waits the awful bacillus,

The sempiternal, most infernal omnipresent germ.

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Each Evening A Good-looking Mr
'tis Now The Wily Urchin Mocks The Lynx-eyed Cop Along The Docks And Plunges In The Cooling Tide Arrayed In Naught Else But His Hide
A Young Lady In Philadelphia Is Said To Have Had Five Lovers All Named Samuel
I Am Quite Surprised Mr
When You See A Young Man Cleaning A Girl's Bicycle They Are Engaged; But When You See The Operation Reversed They Are Married
So You Were Bound And Gagged By Bandits While In Italy Were You
That Young Gentleman Has A Very Taking Manner Said One Young Lady To Another At A Party Of A Young Man Who Had Just Left Them
He--didn't You Promise To Love Honor And Obey Me
John--say Do You Want To Get Next To A Scheme For Making Money Fast
Mashington--what's The Matter With Your Clock
Condon--have You Been Cured Of That Last Attack Of Malaria
Knock And The World Knocks With You
The Governess--what Happened When The Man Killed The Goose That Laid The Golden Egg Margie
He Called Her An Angel Before They Were Wed But That Alas
Gee Whizz
Pat Said One Catholic Friend To Another
Irish Stew Said The Restaurant Guest
Will The Coming Man Use Both Arms
A Simple Old Farmer Mcveagh Whom Every One Said Was A Jeagh Fell In With A Man On The Confidence Plan And Now He Is Back Making Heagh
You Are Absolutely Certain About Your Statement
You Want A Divorce From Your Wife Do You
How To Gain Flesh--buy Out A Butcher Shop
What A Distinguished Looking Man
Maud--how Do You Define Love
I Saw Your Sister On The Street To-day