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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




What do you mean by referring to Miss Elderly as a pall-bearer

Puns Home











"What do you mean by referring to Miss Elderly as a pall-bearer?"



"She sits around all day long with a green parrot on her

shoulder. I don't like such Poll-bearers."











Next: COURTNEY--When you proposed to Miss Dexter did you get down on your knees

Previous: SMITH--They say that after a time the engineer of a limited flyer loses his nerve



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Puns

Caller--wonder If I Can See Your Mother Little Boy
Playwright--there Is A Great Climax In The Last Act
I'll Pass The Butter Said He While Trying To Pass The Browsing Goat
Tom--i Kissed Her When She Wasn't Looking
How Did You Cure Your Boy Of Swearing
Speaking Of Accommodating Hotel Clerks Remarked A Portland Commercial Traveller The Best I Ever Saw Was In A Town Near Bangor
Sentimental Wife--last Night I Dreamt That I Was In Heaven
An Art-school Student Recently Painted The Picture Of A Dog Under A Tree So Lifelike That It Was Impossible To Distinguish The Bark Of The Tree From That Of The Dog
The Only Remedy--mamma I Dess You'll Have To Turn The Hose On Me
Well I See Admiral Dewey's Rank Is Reduced
He's Quite A Star As An After Dinner Speaker Isn't He
I Saw Some Delicious Apples Growing On A Tree This Morning
She Heard The Fog-horn Blowing And What Is That
A Deaf And Dumb Mute Recently Went Into A Bicycle Shop And Picked Up A Hub And Spoke
The Street Car Lurched
My Lord Said The Foreman Of An Irish Jury When Giving In His Verdict We Find The Man Who Stole The Mare Not Guilty
Why Do You Call Him 'mr
An English Motorist Is Quoted As Saying That He Classed Pedestrians As The Quick And The Dead: Those Who Got Out Of The Way And Those Who Didn't
This Liver Is Awful Maud Said Mr
There Is But One Thing Said The Professor Of Medicine Gravely That We Know About Death
You Have Been Losing Flesh Lately Haven't You
Where Are You Working Now
We Don't Always Know Just How The Other Half Lives; But In Chicago The Better Half Lives On Her Alimony
A Boy Who Is Frequently Chastised Both By His Mother And Grandmother Speaks Of Them As A Spanking Team
Only Tells Half