When the penniless lordling to get a rich wife Of his own nationality fails He crosses the ocean with heart light and gay And robs the United States males
When the penniless lordling to get a rich wife
Of his own nationality fails,
He crosses the ocean with heart light and gay
And robs the United States males.
More
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What was the subject of your debate this evening
"What was the subject of your debate this evening?" "Whisky." "Was it well discussed?" "Yes, most of the members were full of the subject." ... What's the matter here
"What's the matter here?" "Man broke his neck." "What story did he fall from?" "Didn't fall--tried to see the top of the building." ... What's the matter here
"What's the matter here?" asked a stranger of a small boy, as he noticed a large wedding party coming out of a church on Fifth avenue. "Nawthin' but the tied goin' out." ... What's the matter John
"What's the matter, John? You look kind o' weather-beaten this morning." "That's exactly what I am. I bet five dollars it would rain yesterday, and it didn't!" ... What's the matter with Smith
"What's the matter with Smith?" "Why?" "He goes along as abstractedly as though he were drunk and were seeing double." "He is. They have twins at his home." ... When a couple are about to elope the young man asks
When a couple are about to elope the young man asks, "Does your mother know your route?" ... When a man is short of money he finds most of his friends whom he meets short-sighted
When a man is short of money he finds most of his friends whom he meets short-sighted. ... When a woman finds her dress does not match her complexion it is always easy enough to change her complexion
When a woman finds her dress does not match her complexion, it is always easy enough to change her complexion. ... When I was eating my dinner to-day the butter ran
"When I was eating my dinner to-day the butter ran." "That's nothing. I was up-town last night and saw a cake walk." ... When Lot found his wife transformed into a pillar of salt he was wise enough to let it go at that and not take a fresh one
When Lot found his wife transformed into a pillar of salt, he was wise enough to let it go at that and not take a fresh one. ... When the curtain at the theater takes a drop the majority of the males in the audience go out to follow suit
When the curtain at the theater takes a drop the majority of the males in the audience go out to follow suit. ... When the old man is shaking down the furnace carrying out the ashes feeding the cat and six kittens and making the beds remarked the observer of events and things of course he is too busy to hear his daughter in the parlor singing: 'Everybody Works bu
"When the old man is shaking down the furnace, carrying out the ashes, feeding the cat and six kittens, and making the beds," remarked the observer of events and things, "of course he is too busy to hear his daughter in the parlor, singing: 'Every... When the penniless lordling to get a rich wife Of his own nationality fails He crosses the ocean with heart light and gay And robs the United States males
When the penniless lordling to get a rich wife Of his own nationality fails, He crosses the ocean with heart light and gay And robs the United States males. ... When was money first invented
"When was money first invented?" "I don't know. When was it?" "When the dove brought the greenback to Noah." ... When we first dined at a cafe We feared they'd drop their trays but later We learned somewhat to our dismay It takes--as scores of men will say-- A big tip to upset a waiter
When we first dined at a cafe We feared they'd drop their trays, but later We learned, somewhat to our dismay, It takes--as scores of men will say-- A big "tip" to upset a waiter. ... When were walking-sticks first invented
"When were walking-sticks first invented?" "When?" "When Eve presented Adam with a little Cain." ... When you see a young man cleaning a girl's bicycle they are engaged; but when you see the operation reversed they are married
When you see a young man cleaning a girl's bicycle, they are engaged; but when you see the operation reversed, they are married. ... Where are you going my pretty maid
"Where are you going, my pretty maid?" "Out automobiling, sir," she said. "May I go with you, my pretty maid?" "If you can steer the old thing, you may," she said. ... Where are you going my pretty maid
"Where are you going, my pretty maid?" "I'm going to cut the corn," she said. "Can I go with you, my pretty maid?" "You're no chiropodist," she said. ... Where are you working now
"Where are you working now?" "I'm working down in a match factory." "How is business?" "Light." ... Where did you get that hair on your coat
"Where did you get that hair on your coat?" "From the head of the bed." ... Whether tall men or short men are best Or bold men or modest and shy men I can't say but this I protest All the fair are in favor of Hy-men
Whether tall men, or short men are best, Or bold men, or modest and shy men, I can't say, but this I protest, All the fair are in favor of Hy-men. ... Who was the first one that came from the ark when it landed
"Who was the first one that came from the ark when it landed." "Noah." "You are wrong. Don't the good book tell us that Noah came forth? So there must have been three ahead of him." ... Why are pugilists like chickens
"Why are pugilists like chickens?" "Because they live on 'scraps!'" ...