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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




Why did you insist on only $99000 a year as your salary

Puns Home











"Why did you insist on only $99,000 a year as your salary?"



"Because," answered the high financier, "as soon as people hear a

hundred thousand mentioned they get suspicious. It is better to

keep the figure marked down a little."











Next: Tom--I kissed her when she wasn't looking

Previous: He has none of the finer sensibilities nothing to distinguish him from the common herd



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Puns

Here Lies Poor Sam: And What Is Strange Grim Death Has Worked In Him A Change---- He Always Lied And Always Will He Once Lied Loud And Now Lies Still
I Don't Give A Rap Said The Coachman Haughtily As He Rang The Electric Bell
As Man And Wife Are One The Husband When Seated With His Wife Must Be Beside Himself
The Fate Of Lot's Wife Was All Her Own Fault; She First Turned To Rubber And Then Turned To Salt
Is Your Friend The Dentist A Society Chap
I Saw De Castro The Magician Make A $20 Gold Piece Disappear In Three Minutes
An Irishman Just Landed Seeing An Electric-motor Car Running For The First Time Exclaimed: Well Well Ould Nick Must Be Pullin' It Wid A String
Little Mary Quite Contrary
A Notice At A Small Depot Near Manchester Reads: Passengers Are Requested To Cross Over The Railway By The Subway
Well Have You Anything To Say
What I Like About The Irish Is That They Are So Modest And Unassuming
Cleverton--miss Cutler Tells Me She Has Been Putting Quinine On Her Face Lately For Her Complexion
Bluff A Little Bluff A Little As You Go Your Way; Bluffing May Not Always Help You-- Many Times It May
The Sunshine Warm And Budding Trees Made Johnny Feel Quite Gay
Irish Foreman To Gang Of Men In A Sewer: How Many Men Is Down In That Hole
Are Any Of The Colors Discernible To The Touch
And So Prof
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He--then I Am To Understand That You Have Given Me The Mitten As It Were
Full Many A Coat Tail That Is Long And Wide Does From The Public Gaze Two Monstrous Patches Hide
A Certain Young Man Told His Girl The Other Night That If She Didn't Marry Him He'd Get A Rope And Hang Himself Right In Front Of Her Home
First Fly--did It Ever Occur To You The Baldheaded Men Have A Keener Sense Of Humor Than Others
The Detective At The Boarding House Table Having Satisfied Himself That Nobody Had Observed Him Folded Up His Magnifying Glass And Put It Back In His Pocket
How Are You To-day
Stranger--boy Can You Direct Me To The Bank