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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Ah
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




Why do you call him 'Mr

Puns Home











"Why do you call him 'Mr. Gimlet?' That isn't his name."



"I know. But he's such a bore!"











Next: AMERICAN--You have noticed I suppose that the balance of trade so far as your country and ours are concerned is still in our favor

Previous: BROWN--Up at Hagenbeck's show there is a large bear that hugs a woman without killing her



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Puns

Elderly Man (greeting Former Acquaintance)--i Remember Your Face Perfectly Miss But Your Name Has Escaped Me
As He Walked With Baby He Had To Confess That Marriage With Him Was A Howling Success
A Bashful Young Couple Who Were Evidently Very Much In Love Entered A Crowded Street Car In Boston The Other Day
I See Villainy In Your Face Said A Judge To A Prisoner
The Butcher Is A Fair Minded Fellow
They Cannot Be Complete In Aught Who Are Not Humorously Prone; A Man Without A Merry Thought Can Hardly Have A Funny Bone
Lovett--you Don't Believe In Divorce Then
Jack--are You A Suitor For Miss Juliet's Hand
Playwright--there Is A Great Climax In The Last Act
The Word 'reviver' Spells The Same Backwards And Forwards
Old Lady (at A Ball Game)--why Do They Call That A Fowl
I'll Never Ask Another Woman To Marry Me As Long As I Live
The Man Who Was Run Over By The Cars The Other Day Is Now Out Of Danger
The Fate Of Lot's Wife Was All Her Own Fault; She First Turned To Rubber And Then Turned To Salt
Don't You Find It Easier To Shave Some Men Than Others
Pa What Branches Did You Take When You Went To School
Sing Not To Me Of Falling Dew Upon The Purple Hills For I Am Worried Far Too Much By Falling Due Of Bills
He Kissed Her On The Cheek; It Seemed A Harmless Frolic; He's Been Laid Up A Week-- They Say With Painter's Colic
What Must A Man Be That He Shall Be Buried With Military Honors
Mother--what Did Your Father Say When He Saw His Broken Pipe
Diner--hello
When You See A Young Man Cleaning A Girl's Bicycle They Are Engaged; But When You See The Operation Reversed They Are Married
'tis Now The Wily Urchin Mocks The Lynx-eyed Cop Along The Docks And Plunges In The Cooling Tide Arrayed In Naught Else But His Hide
A Squall On The Sea Is A Stress Of Weather And A Squaller On Land Is A Songstress
They Caught The Burglars That Robbed The Hotel Last Night