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Beer

Stories Jokes Home




The father of a school boy in New York City wrote to the boy's teacher a
letter of complaint. Possibly he welcomed the advent of
prohibition--possibly not! Anyhow, the letter was as follows:

"Sir: Will you please for the future give my boy some eesier somes to do
at nites. This is what he brought home to me three nites ago. If fore
gallins of bere will fill thirty to pint bottles, how many pint and half
bottles will nine gallins fill? Well, we tried and could make nothing of
it all, and my boy cried and said he wouldn't go back to school without
doing it. So, I had to go and buy a nine gallin' keg of bere, which I
could ill afford to do, and then we went and borrowed a lot of wine and
brandy bottles, beside a few we had by us. Well we emptied the keg into
the bottles, and there was nineteen, and my boy put that down for an
answer. I don't know whether it is rite or not, as we spilt some in
doing it.

P. S.--Please let the next one be water as I am not able to buy any more
bere."

* * *

The new soda clerk was a mystery, until he himself revealed his shameful
past quite unconsciously by the question he put to the girl who had just
asked for an egg-shake.

"Light or dark?" he asked mechanically.





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