Deafness


In the smoking-room of a theatre, between the acts, an amiable young man

addressed an elderly gentleman who was seated beside him:



"The show is very good, don't you think?"



The old gentleman nodded approvingly, as he replied:



"Me, I always take the surface cars. Them elevated an' subway stairs

ketches my breath."



"I said the show was a good one," exclaimed the you
g man, raising his

voice.



Again, the elderly person nodded agreeably.



"They jump about a good deal," was his comment, "but they're on the

ground, which the others ain't."



Now, the young man shouted:



"You're a little deaf, ain't you?"



At last the other understood.



"Yes, sir!" he announced proudly. "I'm as deef as a post." He chuckled

contentedly. "Some folks thinks as that's a terrible affliction, but I

don't. I kin always hear what I'm sayin' myself, an' that's interestin'

enough for me."



* * *



An excellent old gentleman grew hard of hearing, and was beset with

apprehension lest he become totally deaf. One day, as he rested on a

park bench, another elderly citizen seated himself alongside. The

apprehensive old gentleman saw that the new comer was talking rapidly,

but his ears caught no faintest sound of the other's voice. He listened

intently--in vain. He cupped a hand to his ear, but there was only

silence. At last, in despair, he spoke his thought aloud:



"It's come at last! I know you've been talking all this while, but I

haven't heard a single word."



The answer, given with a grin, was explicit and satisfying to the

worried deaf man:



"I hain't been talkin'--jest a-chewin'."



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