The Gloomy Guest
Cause And Effect
What He Preferred
The Floor Held
Random Stories Jokes
A Dreadful Possibility
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A very black little girl made her way into the presence of the lady of
the house, and with much embarrassment, but very clearly, explained who
she was, and what her mission:
"Please, mum, I'se Ophelia. I'se de washerwoman's little girl, an' mama,
she sent me to say, would you please to len' her a dime. She got to pay
* * *
The successful financier snorted contemptuously.
"Money! pooh! there are a million ways of making money."
"But only one honest way," a listener declared.
"What way is that?" the financier demanded.
"Naturally, you wouldn't know," was the answer.
* * *
The eminent financier was discoursing.
"The true secret of success," he said, "is to find out what the people
"And the next thing," someone suggested, "is to give it to them."
The financier shook his head contemptuously.
"No--to corner it."
* * *
The eminent banker explained just how he started in business:
"I had nothing to do, and I rented an empty store, and put up a sign,
_Bank_. As soon as I opened for business, a man dropped in, and made a
deposit of two hundred dollars. The next day another man dropped in and
deposited three hundred dollars. And so, sir, the third day, my
confidence in the enterprise reached such a point that I put in fifty
dollars of my own money."