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Jipson's Great Dinner Party
"Well, you must do it." "Do it?" "Do it, sir," reiterated the lady of Jipson, a man well enough to do in the world, chief clerk of a "sugar baker," and receiving his twenty hundred dollars a year, with no perquisites, however, and--plenty of ...
Jolly Old Times
Either mankind or his constitution has changed since "the good old times," for we read in an old medicine book, that bleeding at the nose, and cramp, could be effectually prevented by wearing a dried toad in a bag at the pit of the stomach; while ...
Legal Advice
Old Ben. Franklin said it was his opinion that, between imprisonment and being at large in debt to your neighbor, there was no difference worthy the name of it. Some people have a monstrous sight of courage in debt, more than they have out of it, ...
Look Out For Them Lobsters
Deacon ----, who resides in a pleasant village inside of an hour's ride upon Fitchburg road, rejoices in a fondness for the long-tailed crustacea, vulgarly known as lobsters. And, from messes therewith fulminated, by some of our professors of gast...
Major Blink's First Season At Saratoga
"Ha, ha!" said Uncle Joe Blinks, as the subject of summer travel, a jaunt somewhere, was being discussed among the regular boarders in Mrs. Bamberry's spacious old-fashioned parlors; "Ha! ha! ha! ladies, did Mrs. Bamberry ever tell you of my tour ...
Miseries Of A Dandy
That poverty is at times very unhandy--yea, humiliating, we can bear witness; but that any persons should make their poverty an everlasting subject of shame and annoyance to themselves, is the most contemptible nonsense we know of. During our juni...
Miseries Of Bachelorhood
Dabster says he would not mind living as a bachelor, but when he comes to think that bachelors must die--that they have got to go down to the grave "without any body to cry for them"--it gives him a chill that frost-bites his philosophy. Dabster w...
Mixing Meanings Mangling English
There is an individual in Quincy Market, "doing business," who is down on customers who don't speak proper. "What's eggs, this morning?" says a customer. "Eggs, of course," says the dealer. "I mean--how do they go?" "Go?--where?" "Sho...
Mysteries And Miseries Of Housekeeping
People of experience tell awful stories about the miseries of boarding, and boarding-houses, and it is very clearly palpable to us that keepers of boarding-houses could a tale unfold of their own miseries, equal, if not double that of the luckless...
Mysteries And Miseries Of The Life Of A City Editor
A great deal has been written, to show that the literary business is a very disagreeable business; and that branch of it coming under the "Editorial" head is about as comfortable as the bed of Procustes would be to an invalid. It may doubtless loo...
Nights With The Caucusers
Office-Seeking has become a legitimatized branch of our every-day business, as much so as in former times "reduced gentlemen" took to keeping school or posting books. In former times, men took to politics to give zest to a life already replete wit...
Nursing A Legacy
Waiting for dead men's shoes is a slow and not very sure business; sometimes it pays and sometimes it don't. I know a genius who lost by it, and his case will bear repeating, for there is both morality and fun in it. Lev Smith, a native of "the...
Old Jack Ringbolt
Had been spinning old Mrs. Tartaremetic any quantity of salty yarns; she was quite surprised at Mr. Ringbolt's ups and downs, trials, travels and tribulations. Honest Jack (!) had assured the old dame that he had sailed over many and many cities, ...
Old Maguire And His Horse Bonny Doon
Few animals possess the sagacity of the horse; passive and obedient, they are easily trained; bring them up the way you want them to go, and they'll go it! The horse in his old age does not forget the precepts of his youth. A very touching anecdot...
Passing Around The Fodder!
A DINNER SKETCH. A few weeks ago, during a passage from Gotham to Boston, on the "Empire State," one of the most elegant and swift steamers that ever man's ingenuity put upon the waters, I met a well-known joker from the Quaker city, on his fir...
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The Science Of Diddling
The Pigeon Express Man
Jipson's Great Dinner Party
Look Out For Them Lobsters
The Fitzfaddles At Hull
Putting Me On A Platform!
The Exorbitancy Of Meanness
Taking Down A Sheriff
Least Viewed
The Science Of Diddling
The Pigeon Express Man
Jipson's Great Dinner Party
Look Out For Them Lobsters
The Fitzfaddles At Hull
Putting Me On A Platform!
The Exorbitancy Of Meanness
Taking Down A Sheriff