Nothing New To Him


The motor car was driven by a determined young woman, who had knocked

down a man without injuring him much.



She did not try to get away. Instead, she stopped the car, descended to

the solid earth and faced him manfully.



"I'm sorry it happened," she said grudgingly, "but it was all your

fault. You must have been walking carelessly. I'm an experienced driver.

I've been driving a car for seven
ears."



"Well," replied her victim angrily, "I'm not a novice myself. I've been

walking for fifty-seven years."



* * *



_Lady_ (_to pedlar_): "No, thank you, we never buy anything at the

door."



_Pedlar:_ "Then I've just the thing for you, Madam. You will, I am sure,

appreciate these tasteful little 'No Pedlars' notices."



* * *



There is a lot to be said for the cheap car, we read. Yes; but it is

just as well not to say it when there are women and children around.



* * *



_Mother:_ It is rude to whisper, Humphrey.



_Humphrey_ (_aged five_): Well, I was saying what a funny nose that

man's got. So you see it would have been much ruder if I'd said it

aloud.



* * *



_She_ (_pouting_): You don't value my kisses as you used to.



_He:_ Value them? Why, before we were married I used to expect a dozen

in payment for a box of candy, and now I consider only one of them

sufficient payment for a new dress.



* * *



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