Like Georgia in hell
A new arrival in Hell was brought before the devil. The devil told his demon to put the man to work on a rock pile with a 20-pound sledge hammer in 95 degree heat with 95% humidity. <BR> <BR> At the end of the day, the devil went to see how the man was ... Microsoft tech drafted
One of Microsoft Network's finest support techs was drafted into the Army and sent to boot camp. <BR> <BR> At the rifle range, he was given some instructions, handed a rifle, and a couple rounds of ammo. He loaded the rifle and fired several shots at th... Minister for drinks
A southern minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great expression, he said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and pour it into the river." <BR> With even greater emphasis, he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd t... Not another virus
*** VIRUS ALERT *** <BR> <BR> If you receive an email entitled "Badtimes" delete it immediately. Do not open it! It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your computer. <BR> <BR>... Octopus in the bar
A man walks into a bar and he has a pet octopus. He sits down at the bar and says to the bartender "give us two beers over here!" <BR> <BR> The bartender walks over and see's the octopus and he says, "Didn't you see the sign over there it says no pets a... One good Deed
A guy just died and he's at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted, while St. Peter is leafin' through this Big Book to see if the guy is worthy. St. Peter goes through the Book several times and furrows his brow <BR> "You know, I can't see that you ev... Panda in a bar
A panda bear walks into a bar, and tells the bartender that he wants to have lunch. The bartender gives him a menu and he orders. <BR> <BR> The panda bear eats his lunch, and when he finishes, he gets up to leave. Suddenly, the panda bear pulls an AK-47... Prize Goat
Well, a man was driving down a country road, and he decided to get out and get some fresh air. <BR> <BR> He got out, and started walking in a meadow. As he walked, he came upon a hole. Wanting to see how deep it was, he threw a pebble down. No sound. So... Problems printing yellow
I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn't solve. She could not print yellow. All the other colors would print fine, which truly baffled me because the o... Romantic food
Joe was not a very romantic person, and furthermore he was rather stupid. But he wanted to impress his wife, so he took her out for an anniversary dinner and watched the couples around them, following their leads. <BR> <BR> He observed the couple next t... Scotsman at a baseball game
A Scottish tourist attended his first baseball game in the US and after a base hit he hears the fans roaring "Run....Run!" <BR> The next batter connects heavily with the ball and the Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd in his thick accent: "R-r-r... Signal man's test
Tom is applying for a job as a signalman for the local railroad, and is told to meet the inspector at the signal box. <BR> <BR> The inspector decides to give Tom a pop quiz, asking, "What would you do if you realized that two trains were heading towards... Smart Dog
A butcher is working, and really busy. He notices a dog in his shop and shoos him away. Later, he notices the dog is back again. He walks over to the dog, and notices the dog has a note in his mouth. The butcher takes the note, and it reads, "Can I have 1... Telesales
One thing that has always bugged me, and I'm sure it does most of you, is to sit down at the dinner table only to be interrupted by a phone call from a telemarketer. <BR> <BR> I decided, on one such occasion, to try to be as irritating as they were to m... The chastity belt
All the good knights were leaving for the Crusades. <BR> <BR> One knight told his best friend - "My bride is without doubt one of the most beautiful women in the world. It would be a terrible waste if no man could have her. Therefore, as my best and mos...

How old am I? Calling in sick The chastity belt Cat on the roof Blind pilots Romantic food Horse power Funeral arrangements

Microsoft tech drafted Don't confuse mac's with PC's Animal football match Prize Goat Before it starts Baking funeral Panda in a bar Octopus in the bar