Value Of Nothing
PORSON one day sent his gyp with a note to a certain Cantab, requesting him to find the value of nothing. Next day he met his friend walking, and stopping him, desired to know, Whether he had succeeded? His friend answered, Yes!--And what may it be?... Vast Domain
A GENTLEMAN having a servant with a very thick skull, used often to call him the king of fools. I wish, said the fellow one day, you could make your words good, I should then be the greatest monarch in the world. ... Vera Cannie
A YOUNG lady, pressed by friends to marry a decent, but poor man, on the plea, Marry for love, and work for siller, replied, It's a' vera true, but a kiss and a tinniefu[C] o' cauld water maks a gey wersh[D] breakfast. [C] Tinnie, the small porri... Verse And Worse
AMONG a company of cheerful Irishmen, in the neighborhood of St. Giles, it was proposed by the host to make a gift of a couple of fowls to him that, off-hand, should write six lines in poetry of his own composing. Several of the merry crew attempted... Verses Written On A Window In The Highlands Of Scotland
SCOTLAND! thy weather's like a modish wife, Thy winds and rains for ever are at strife; So termagant awhile her thunder tries, And when she can no longer scold, she cries. ... Very Appropriate
A FACETIOUS old gentleman, who thought his two sons consumed too much time in hunting and shooting, styled them Nimrod and Ramrod. ... Very Clear
WHAT is light? asked a schoolmaster of the booby of a class. A sovereign that isn't full weight is light, was the prompt reply. ... Very Easy
ON the approach of Holy Week, a great lady said to her friend, We must, however, mortify ourselves a little.--Well, replied the other, let us make our servants fast. ... Very Evident
GARRICK and Rigby, once walking together in Norfolk, observed upon a board at a house by the roadside, the following strange inscription: A GOES KOORED HEAR.--How is it possible, said Rigby, that such people as these can cure agues?--I do not know, ... Very Like A Whale
THE first of all the royal infant males Should take the title of the Prince of Wales; Because 'tis clear to seamen and to lubber, Babies and whales are both inclined to blubber. ... Very Like Each Other
IT appears that there were two persons of the name of Dr. John Thomas, not easily to be distinguished; for somebody (says Bishop Newton) was speaking of Dr. Thomas, when it was asked, which Dr. Thomas do you mean?--Dr. John Thomas.--They are both na... Very Likely
AN English officer lost his leg at the battle of Vittoria, and after suffering amputation with the greatest courage, thus addressed his servant who was crying, or pretending to cry, in one corner of the room, None of your hypocritical tears, you idl... Very Likely
AN officer of the navy being asked what Burke meant by the Cheap defence of nations, replied, A midshipman's half-pay,--nothing a-day and find yourself. ... Very Pointed
SIR JOHN HAMILTON, who had severely suffered from the persecutions of the law, used to say, that an attorney was like a hedgehog, it was impossible to touch him anywhere without pricking one's fingers. ... Very Pretty
ONE day, just as an English officer had arrived at Vienna, the empress knowing that he had seen a certain princess much celebrated for her beauty, asked him if it was really true that she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. I thought so y...

A Walking Stick Idolatry Erudite White Teeth An Honor To Tipperary Ingratitude Welsh Wig-ging A New Sign

The Tanner; An Epigram A Pertinent Question Henry Erskine Walpoliana Very Likely A Seasonable Joke Measure For Measure The Debt Paid