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The amiable old lady was overheard talking to herself as she left the
church along with the crowd that had attended the services:

"If everybody else would only do as I do, and stay quietly in their
seats till everyone else has gone out, there would not be such a crush
at the doors."

* * *

Two friends from Ireland on a tour occupied the same bedchamber in a
country inn. During the night a fearful storm raged. John spoke of it in
the morning while the two men were dressing.

"Did it rain?" Dennis asked in surprise.

"Rain!" John exclaimed. "It was a deluge, and the lightnin' was blindin'
and the thunder was deafenin'. Sure, I never heard the like."

"For the love of Hivvin!" Dennis cried out. "Why didn't yez waken me?
Didn't yez know I never can slape whin it thunders!"





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