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Resolutions When I Come To Be Old

Irish Humour Home






These resolutions seem to be of that kind which are easily formed, and
the propriety of which we readily admit at the time we make them, but
secretly never design to put them in practice.

1. Not to marry a young woman.

2. Not to keep young company, unless they really desire it.

3. Not to be peevish, or morose, or suspicious.

4. Not to scorn present ways, or wits, or fashions, or men, or war, &c.

5. Not to be fond of children.

6. Not to tell the same story over and over to the same people.

7. Not to be covetous.

8. Not to neglect decency or cleanliness, for fear of falling into
nastiness.

9. Not to be over severe with young people, but to give allowance for
their youthful follies and weaknesses.

10. Not to be influenced by, or give ear to, knavish tattling servants,
or others.

11. Not to be too free of advice, nor trouble any but those who desire
it.

12. To desire some good friends to inform me which of these resolutions
I break or neglect, and wherein; and reform accordingly.

13. Not to talk much, nor of myself.

14. Not to boast of my former beauty or favor with ladies, &c.

15. Not to hearken to flatteries, or believe I can be beloved by a young
woman.

16. Not to be positive or opiniative.

17. Not to set up for observing all these rules, for fear I should
observe none.





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