A woman is only a woman, but a good cigar is a smoke.--_Rudyard
AUNT MARY--(horrified) "Good gracious. Harold, what would your mother
say if she saw you smoking cigarets?" HAROLD (calmly)--"She'd have a
fit. They're her cigarets."
An Irish soldier on sentry duty had orders to allow no one to smoke near
his post. An officer with a lighted cigar approached whereupon Pat
boldly challenged him and ordered him to put it out at once.
The officer with a gesture of disgust threw away his cigar, but no
sooner was his back turned than Pat picked it up and quietly retired to
the sentry box.
The officer happening to look around, observed a beautiful cloud of
smoke issuing from the box. He at once challenged Pat for smoking on
"Smoking, is it, sor? Bedad, and I'm only keeping it lit to show the
corporal when he comes as evidence agin you."