REMINDERS
The wife of an overworked promoter said at breakfast: "Will you post this letter for me, dear? It's to the furrier, countermanding my order for that $900 sable and ermine stole. You'll be sure to remember?" The tired eyes of the harassed, sha... REPARTEE
Repartee is saying on the instant what you didn't say until the next morning. Among the members of a working gang on a certain railroad was an Irishman who claimed to be very good at figures. The boss, thinking that he would get ahead of Pat,... REPORTING
_See_ Journalism; Newspapers. ... REPUBLICAN PARTY
The morning after a banquet, during the Democratic convention in Baltimore, a prominent Republican thus greeted an equally well-known Democrat: "I understand there were some Republicans at the banquet last night." "Oh, yes," said the Democrat... REPUTATION
Popularity is when people like you; and reputation is when they ought to, but really can't.--_Frank Richardson_. ... RESEMBLANCES
Senator Blackburn is a thorough Kentuckian, and has all the local pride of one born in the blue-grass section of his State. He also has the prejudice against being taken for an Indianian which seems inherent in all native-born Kentuckians. While c... RESIGNATION
"Then you don't think I practice what I preach, eh?" queried the minister in talking with one of the deacons at a meeting. "No, sir, I don't," replied the deacon "You've been preachin' on the subject of resignation for two years an' ye haven't r... RESPECTABILITY
"Is he respectable?"' "Eminently so. He's never been indicted for anything less than stealing a railroad."--_Wasp_. ... REST CURE
A weather-beaten damsel somewhat over six feet in height and with a pair of shoulders proportionately broad appeared at a back door in Wyoming and asked for light housework. She said that her name was Lizzie, and explained that she had been ill wi... RETALIATION
You know that fellow, Jim McGroiarty, the lad that's always comin' up and thumpin' ye on the chest and yellin', 'How are ye?'" "I know him." "I'll bet he's smashed twinty cigars for me--some of them clear Havanny--but I'll get even with him n... REVOLUTIONS
Haiti was in the midst of a revolution. As a phase of it two armed bodies were approaching each other so that a third was about to be caught between them. The commander of the third party saw the predicament. On the right government troops, o... REWARDS
Said a great Congregational preacher To a hen, "You're a beautiful creature." And the hen, just for that, Laid an egg in his hat, And thus did the Hen reward Beecher. ... RHEUMATISM
FARMER BARNES--"I've bought a barometer, Hannah, to tell when it's going to rain, ye know." MRS. BARNES--"To tell when it's goin' to rain! Why, I never heard o' such extravagance. What do ye s'pose th' Lord has given ye th' rheumatis for?"--_Ti... ROADS
A Yankee just returning to the states was dining with an Englishman, and the latter complained of the mud in America. "Yes," said the American, "but it's nothing to the mud over here." "Nonsense!" said the Englishman. "Fact," the American r... ROASTS
As William Faversham was having his luncheon in a Birmingham hotel he was much annoyed by another visitor, who, during the whole of the meal, stood with his back to the fire warming himself and watching Faversham eat. At length, unable to endure i...

AFTER DINNER SPEECHES LIARS THIN PEOPLE EMPLOYERS AND EMPLOYEES COURAGE FAITH FORGETFULNESS GUESTS

RECONCILIATIONS SPECULATION SYNONYMS DESCRIPTION MATHEMATICS SUBWAYS INQUISITIVENESS FAILURES