What do you think of the statement that there are three hundred haunted houses in New York
"What do you think of the statement that there are three hundred haunted houses in New York?" asked Mr. Knickerbocker. "Oh," replied Jones, "that only ghost to show how plentiful spirits are here." ... What do you think of Windig
What do you think of Windig? He reminds me of a river. What's the answer? The biggest part of him is his mouth. ... What have you got to say for yourself
"What have you got to say for yourself?" "Jes dis, suh; I wants a liar to defend me." "You mean a lawyer?" "Yes, suh; I knowed I most had it!" ... What have you here
"What have you here?" asked the fresh young man of the waiter at a first-class restaurant. "Everything, sir." "Everything?" sneeringly, "Have it served at once." "Hash for one," yelled the waiter. ... What I like about the Irish is that they are so modest and unassuming
"What I like about the Irish is that they are so modest and unassuming." "Holy smoke!" "Fact. When an Irishman does anything great he does not go bragging of his ability as another man would. He merely brags about Ireland." ... What in the world shall I do with the baby John
"What in the world shall I do with the baby, John? She's crying for the moon." "That's nothing. Wait till she's eighteen and she'll want the earth." ... What is a swell affair Jim
"What is a swell affair, Jim?" "Swell affair! lemme see. Ah! yes, I know--a boil." "Something else, try again." "No, give it up." "A hill, ye know. Don't ye see, a hill is a swell affair, and besides all hills have got crests." ... What is love
"What is love?" "A fresh egg." "Marriage?" "Hard boiled eggs." "Divorce?" "Scrambled eggs." ... What is the best way to raise cabbage
"What is the best way to raise cabbage?" "With a knife and fork." ... What is the difference between the admission to a dime museum and the admission to Sing Sing
"What is the difference between the admission to a dime museum and the admission to Sing Sing?" "Don't know. What?" "One is ten cents and the other is sentence." ... What is the meaning of the saying that a man shall earn his bread in the sweat of his brow
"What is the meaning of the saying that a man shall earn his bread in the sweat of his brow?" asked a boy in a New York school. "Have you never observed a man working on a warm day?" asked the teacher. "No, don't think I ever saw one." "W... What is the plural of man Johnny
"What is the plural of man, Johnny?" asked the teacher of a small pupil. "Men," answered Johnny. "Correct," said the teacher. "And what is the plural of child?" "Twins," was the unexpected answer. ... What is the secret of success
"What is the secret of success?" asked the Sphinx. "Push," said the Button. "Never be led," said the Pencil. "Take pains," said the Window. "Always keep cool," said the Ice. "Be up to date," said the Calendar. "Never lose your head,... What is there about betting on horse-races that is so bad for the health
"What is there about betting on horse-races that is so bad for the health?" said young Mrs. Brown. "I never heard of anything," answered the visitor. "Didn't you? Every time Charley makes a bet he comes home and says there is something wrong ... What is your idea of happiness
"What is your idea of happiness?" "Nothing to do and lots of time to do it in." ...

Whether tall men or short men are best Or bold men or modest and shy men I can't say but this I protest All the fair are in favor of Hy-men Charlemagne was in need of amusement Couples making love will beware of the rubber plant Ma what is a Panama man called Ah Adversity is not without comfort--your enemy may be in harder luck than you Yes there is one part of the dough-nut that wouldn't give you dyspepsia MRS

What's the matter here MRS How by the statesman insincere Man's weary soul is vexed When we first dined at a cafe We feared they'd drop their trays but later We learned somewhat to our dismay It takes--as scores of men will say-- A big tip to upset a waiter Rowley Powley pudding and pie Kissed the girls and made them cry To-morrow never comes they say; But all such talk is idle gush For when we have a debt to pay To-morrow gets there with a rush 'Tis now the wily urchin mocks The lynx-eyed cop along the docks And plunges in the cooling tide Arrayed in naught else but his hide An emblem of tenuity We witness every day; Behold the corset-and you'll see The whale-bone comes to STAY