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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




Nature never allows anything to run to waist

Puns Home











"Nature never allows anything to run to waist."



"Humph! You've never seen a Vermont girl of forty."











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Puns

Tramp--can't You Give A Poor Man Something To Eat
We're All Often Forced To Rob Peter In Order To Settle With Paul But Some Of Us Merely Rob Peter And Paul Never Sees Us At All
What Relation Is A Door-step To A Door-mat
My Lord Said The Foreman Of An Irish Jury When Giving In His Verdict We Find The Man Who Stole The Mare Not Guilty
There Goes A Man Who Leads In Letters
Stranger--boy Can You Direct Me To The Bank
Jones Caught The Hay Fever From Dancing With A Grass Widow
He--i'll Go To-morrow And Buy A Diamond Engagement Ring
You Treat Me Cried Mrs
A Poacher Surprised At His Work And Pursued In His Escape By A Vengefully Thrown Axe Remarked As He Vaulted A Fence: I Have No Fault To Find With Your Remarks But I Object To The Axe-sent
Alas For All Their Ecstasy They Knew Not What Was Best: The Young Man Reached The Front Door The Old Man Did The Rest
Did Your Sweetheart Receive You Warmly Last Night
Can I Sell You A Nice Cheap Trunk To-day
Well, Pat, And How Is That Bull-pup Of Yours Doing
Everybody Knows A Woman Is Hard To Please
What Do You Think Of The Statement That There Are Three Hundred Haunted Houses In New York
How Did That Fight Between The Bridge Tenders End
I Assured Her I Could Support Her In The Style She Was Accustomed To
Anything New In Your Neighborhood
I Suppose Barnum Went To Heaven When He Died
Some Of Us Have More Ups And Downs In This World Than Others But When We Get To The Cemetery We Will All Be On The Dead Level
Haven't I Told You Before He Cried To Sing Out The Names Of Stations Clearly And Distinctly
Do You Think That As A Rule People Who Attend Theaters Are Superstitious
George You Look Exhausted She Said To Him As He Was Putting On His Hat And Coat
Guard--i Suppose When You Were In The Army You Often Saw A Picket Fence