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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




How are you to-day

Puns Home









"How are you to-day?"



"Oh, I can't kick."



"Thought you were ill."



"I am--I have the gout."











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Previous: I saw a sign in a hardware store to-day 'Cast iron sinks



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Puns

You Shouldn't Drink Your Whiskey Without Water
So You Paid $1,000 For A Cook Stove
Smith--they Say That After A Time The Engineer Of A Limited Flyer Loses His Nerve
It's Very Puzzling Said A Worried Looking Woman To One Of Her Neighbors
Mr
--no Matter How High An Awning May Be Suspended It Is Only A Shade Above The Street
When Were Walking-sticks First Invented
Did Any Of You Ever See An Elephant's Skin
There's One Peculiar Feature About The Trust Business
Held By The Enemy--the Ulster Which We Are Unable To Redeem
Yes Said A Landlord Sadly Whose Tenant Had Made A Moonlight Flitting Appearances Are Deceitful; But Disappearances Are Still More So
I Hear They Are Trying To Close Up The Gambling Establishments In New York
See Here Sir Remonstrated The Young Gentleman I Got Up To Give My Seat To The Lady Not To You
Mrs
Are You The Photographer
It's A Good Idea To Make Light Of Your Troubles
She--you Can't Eat Cake And Keep It
I Had Soup In A Restaurant The Other Day And Found An Oyster In It
John--say Do You Want To Get Next To A Scheme For Making Money Fast
He Said To Her: You're Just A Bird
She--you Look As Though You Had Raised Ned At Your Club Last Night
Bill Had A Billboard
When A Woman Finds Her Dress Does Not Match Her Complexion It Is Always Easy Enough To Change Her Complexion
The Death Of Her Husband Must Have Been A Dreadful Blow To Mrs
Have You Received Last Month's Gas Bill Dear