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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




If said the druggist you will give this new tonic a trial I'm sure you will never use any other

Puns Home









"If," said the druggist, "you will give this new tonic a trial

I'm sure you will never use any other."



"Excuse me," rejoined the customer, "but I prefer something less

fatal."











Next: Do you know George Papa thinks you are a literary man

Previous: LANDLADY (proudly)--Nothing goes to waste in this house



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Puns

I Sent A Dollar Last Week Said The Good Thing In Answer To That Advertisement Offering A Method Of Saving One-half My Gas Bills
A Man Who Drives Away Customers--the Cabman
First Fly--did It Ever Occur To You The Baldheaded Men Have A Keener Sense Of Humor Than Others
And So Prof
About The Only Time My Tailor Gives His Customers Regular Fit Said Buttons Is When They Neglect To Pay Their Bills
Nature Never Allows Anything To Run To Waist
I'd Like To See Your Mistress
A Queen Was She--the Beautiful Maid-- Beauty Or Wealth She Did Not Lack-- But The Game Was Euchre That Cupid Played And The Queen Was Won By A Jack
Yes He's Got A Flying-machine Ready For A Trial Now And He's Trying Hard Not To Be Proud
Johnnie--ya-as I've Just Come Back From Ireland--county Cork
Did The Minister Say Anything Comforting
What I Like About The Irish Is That They Are So Modest And Unassuming
Haughty Lady--(who Has Purchased A Stamp)-must I Put It On Myself
A Man Stole A Harness The Other Day And Never Left A Trace
I Understand That Willoughby Was Half Seas Over At The Sneerwell Dinner
Poor Lot's Wife Turned To Salt Alas
Visitor--oh What A Nice Parrot You've Got
He Used To Send Her Roses; He Sent Them Every Hour But Now They're Married And He Sends Her Home A Cauliflower
I Was At A Banquet Last Night
Doctor--you Are Fagged Out; You Must Give Up All Headwork
What Is The Best Way To Raise Cabbage
I Wonder Why Blondes Are Always Anxious To Be Wedded
An Irishman Quarreling With An Englishman Told Him If He Didn't Hold His Tongue He Would Break His Impenetrable Head And Let His Brains Out Of His Empty Skull
If Pearl Street Is Crooked
A Boil In The Pot Is Worth Two On The Neck