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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Mrs
How Are You To-day


Least Viewed

What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




I'm the champion long distance cornet player

Puns Home









I'm the champion long distance cornet player. I entered a contest

once and I played "Annie Laurie" for three weeks.



Did you win?



No, my opponent played "Stars and Stripes Forever."











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Previous: PETERS--Are you not sick of hearing everybody sing that popular song



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Puns

How Is Uncle Mose Coming On
Lovett--you Don't Believe In Divorce Then
I Hate A Liar Wiggins Cried Said Jiggins Then 'twould Seem You Really Ought To Try And Hide Your Lack Of Self-esteem
How Did You Cure Your Boy Of Swearing
Is A Howling Dog A Sign Of Death
Can You Swim Little Boy
Brown--i Hear That They Use All Sorts Of Materials In The Manufacture Of Illuminating Gas Nowadays
Massachusetts Is Noted For Boots And Shoes
The Girl Who Marries A Title Very Frequently Turns Her Fortune To A Count
Pat And Mike Each Wanted To Be First Up On St
A Man And His Bride By The Parson Were Tied And When The Performance Was Done Alas
A Queen Was She--the Beautiful Maid-- Beauty Or Wealth She Did Not Lack-- But The Game Was Euchre That Cupid Played And The Queen Was Won By A Jack
Algy--charming Widow Isn't She
Friend Of Mine To-day Said Mr
I Don't Give A Rap Said The Coachman Haughtily As He Rang The Electric Bell
What Is The Difference Between The Admission To A Dime Museum And The Admission To Sing Sing
I Sent A Dollar Last Week Said The Good Thing In Answer To That Advertisement Offering A Method Of Saving One-half My Gas Bills
A Boil In The Pot Is Worth Two On The Neck
They Say Corporations Have No Soul
He Kissed Her On The Cheek; It Seemed A Harmless Frolic; He's Been Laid Up A Week-- They Say With Painter's Colic
She--i Think This A Lovely Hat You Bought Me George But Really It's A Sin To Pay $50
Moses Schaumburg (to His Son Jackey)--how Many Are Twice Two Jackey
You Haven't A Cent And Yet Wish To Marry Miss Bilyan
It Is A Maine Husband Who Has Dubbed His Wife Crystal Because She Is Always On The Watch
I Wonder Why Blondes Are Always Anxious To Be Wedded