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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




I wouldn't stand for that if I were you

Puns Home











"I wouldn't stand for that if I were you. Why don't you call him

a liar?"



"That's just what I'll do. Where, where is your telephone?"











Next: This murmured the demure maiden when her lover nudged up still closer on the sofa is the closest call I've ever had

Previous: I wish the hot weather would come along sighed the thermometer



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Puns

How Did That Fight Between The Bridge Tenders End
It's A Dridful Bother To Me That I Have To Be Sewing Buttons On Me Own Clothes
She Thinks That Her Husband Is Very Economical
The Following Is A Resolution Of An Irish Corporation: That A New Jail Should Be Built That This Be Done Out Of The Material Of The Old One And The Old Jail To Be Used Until The New One Be Completed
Where Did You Get That Hair On Your Coat
Are Your Folks Well To Do
She--you Look As Though You Had Raised Ned At Your Club Last Night
The Butcher Is A Fair Minded Fellow
Butcher--i Need A Boy About Your Size And Will Give You $1 A Week
And So Prof
When The Curtain At The Theater Takes A Drop The Majority Of The Males In The Audience Go Out To Follow Suit
They Caught The Burglars That Robbed The Hotel Last Night
What Is The Plural Of Man Johnny
The Word 'reviver' Spells The Same Backwards And Forwards
You Ought To Be Very Proud Of Your Wife
Why Are You Sad Bill
I Sent A Dollar Last Week Said The Good Thing In Answer To That Advertisement Offering A Method Of Saving One-half My Gas Bills
Teacher Of Drawing Class--willie Tell Me How You Would Make A Maltese Cross
Is A Howling Dog A Sign Of Death
As He Walked With Baby He Had To Confess That Marriage With Him Was A Howling Success
Husband--my Dear How Would You Like A Book For A Present
Lawyers Practice At The Bar While Bartenders And Mosquitoes Practice Inside Of It
A Man Wanted A Ticket To New York And Only Had A $2 Bill
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
No Indeed She Said I Can Never Be Your Wife