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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




MRS

Puns Home









MRS. PENDERGAST (in disgust)--You call these shades alike! Is

there anything you can match?



MR. PENDERGAST--Yes. Pennies.











Next: Pressed for work--cider

Previous: I am told said she saucily that though you are a military man you are afraid of powder



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Puns

Curious Isn't It
A Man At The Hotel Wanted To Bet That Corbett Would Knock Out Jeffries
A Teacher In A High School Asked A Little Wad Of An Irish Boy To Describe A Lake
A Woman Never Fully Understands The Hardness Of The World Until She Falls Off A Bicycle A Few Times
Bess--may Wears The Worst Clothes When She Is Riding Horseback
We Are Told That Gen
I'll Never Ask Another Woman To Marry Me As Long As I Live
It's A Dridful Bother To Me That I Have To Be Sewing Buttons On Me Own Clothes
I Sent A Dollar Last Week Said The Good Thing In Answer To That Advertisement Offering A Method Of Saving One-half My Gas Bills
Johnnie--ya-as I've Just Come Back From Ireland--county Cork
Sunday School Teacher--what Is Meant In The Parable By A House Built Upon A Rock
Bluff A Little Bluff A Little As You Go Your Way; Bluffing May Not Always Help You-- Many Times It May
What Do You Think Of The Statement That There Are Three Hundred Haunted Houses In New York
Moses Schaumburg (to His Son Jackey)--how Many Are Twice Two Jackey
I'm Not Surprised That Hair-dressers Feel So Much At Ease In The Society Of The Great
This Liver Is Awful Maud Said Mr
Mrs
My Sister Had A Fright Yesterday
It's All Foolishness To Talk About Any One Getting The Worst Of It In The Matrimonial Game Declared The Big Man With A Silk Hat And A Loud Suit Of Clothes
This Is Our Latest Novelty Said The Manufacturer Proudly
The Governess--what Happened When The Man Killed The Goose That Laid The Golden Egg Margie
The First Kiss Only Comes Once In A Lifetime
Ida--yes Dear This Is One Of Those 'perfume' Concerts The Same As They Have In New York
Brown--up At Hagenbeck's Show There Is A Large Bear That Hugs A Woman Without Killing Her
Oh, The Sadness Of Her Sadness When She's Sad