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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




Ah

Puns Home











"Ah! I'm saddest when I sing,"

She sang in plaintive key;

And all the neighbors yelled,

"So are we! so are we."











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Puns

We Should Never Complain Whatever May Befall Us Said The Minister
The Speaker Of The House Is In Deadly Peril When Every Member On The Floor Wants To Get His Eye
Jack--my Wife's A Fine Shot
Ida--yes Dear This Is One Of Those 'perfume' Concerts The Same As They Have In New York
An Old-maid Being At A Loss For A Pin-cushion Made Use Of An Onion For The Purpose
Speaking Of Accommodating Hotel Clerks Remarked A Portland Commercial Traveller The Best I Ever Saw Was In A Town Near Bangor
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Maud--how Do You Define Love
Casey Bet On A Horse Which Finished Last
A Queen Was She--the Beautiful Maid-- Beauty Or Wealth She Did Not Lack-- But The Game Was Euchre That Cupid Played And The Queen Was Won By A Jack
Did You Ever Hear About The Two Holes In Our Back-yard
Teacher--johnny Can You Tell Me What A Section Boss Is
What A Fearful Night I Had When I Drew This Gun The First Time
Dearest Whispered Cordelia After She Had Captured The Coveted Solitaire I Have A Confession To Make
An Irishman Quarreling With An Englishman Told Him If He Didn't Hold His Tongue He Would Break His Impenetrable Head And Let His Brains Out Of His Empty Skull
Tommy--pa Did You Really Mean It When You Said You'd Spank Anyone That Broke That Vase
She--they Say That Your Father Is A Millionaire
Lovett--you Don't Believe In Divorce Then
An Irishman Wandering Up Fifth Avenue Saw In The Window Of A Photographer's Shop A Large Photograph Of Mephisto
How About The Lazy Man Who Hurt His Eye Looking For Work
Railway Clerk--another Accident On The Road To-day Sir
I Hate A Liar Wiggins Cried Said Jiggins Then 'twould Seem You Really Ought To Try And Hide Your Lack Of Self-esteem
Will The Coming Man Use Both Arms
How Could You Endure Talking So Long With That Ugly Old Woman With That Frightful Costume Without Laughing In Her Face
You Own Your Own House Don't You