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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




Why does a donkey eat thistles

Puns Home









"Why does a donkey eat thistles?" asked a Texas teacher of one of

the largest boys in the class.



"Because he is an ass, I reckon."











Next: Doing anything now Bill

Previous: A man stole a harness the other day and never left a trace



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Puns

Why So Glum Blumly
Can You Give Me A Front Room On The First Floor
Teacher Of Drawing Class--willie Tell Me How You Would Make A Maltese Cross
I Will Not Sit That Way
Did You Know That Xanthippe Wife Of One Of The Greatest Of Ancient Philosophers Was A Great Scold
Smith--there Is Something That Will Never Be Boycotted By The Fair Sex As Long As Time Lasts
Boy (with New Gun)--pa Has A Cat Got Nine Lives
Brown--up At Hagenbeck's Show There Is A Large Bear That Hugs A Woman Without Killing Her
I Assured Her I Could Support Her In The Style She Was Accustomed To
Irish Stew Said The Restaurant Guest
Nothing Can Make A Woman So Superlatively Happy As To Have A Baby Of Her Own To Kiss Exclaimed Mrs
Tommy--pa Did You Really Mean It When You Said You'd Spank Anyone That Broke That Vase
I Hear Smith The Sea Captain Is In Hard Luck
Soloman Soloman--our Frent Cohen Must Pe Goin' T' Haf A Fire
The Following Is A Resolution Of An Irish Corporation: That A New Jail Should Be Built That This Be Done Out Of The Material Of The Old One And The Old Jail To Be Used Until The New One Be Completed
So Maude Is Happily Married
Clara--he Gave Me An Army-and-navy Kiss
I Cannot Play Second Fiddle To Any One
If A Guest At A Restaurant Ordered A Lobster And Ate It And Another Guest Did The Same What Would The Latter's Telephone Number Be
Brown--i Hear That They Use All Sorts Of Materials In The Manufacture Of Illuminating Gas Nowadays
No Indeed She Said I Can Never Be Your Wife
And So Prof
What Must A Man Be That He Shall Be Buried With Military Honors
Dick--do You Think You'll Have Much Trouble In Popping The Question
Cholly--ethel Knox Told Me Last Night I Wasn't Over Half-witted