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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




What's the matter John

Puns Home









"What's the matter, John? You look kind o' weather-beaten this

morning."



"That's exactly what I am. I bet five dollars it would rain

yesterday, and it didn't!"











Next: Can you swim little boy

Previous: The sunshine warm and budding trees Made Johnny feel quite gay



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Puns

I Will Not Sit That Way
Did You Hear About Miss Jones
Judge--you Are Charged With Profanity
I Sent A Dollar Last Week Said The Good Thing In Answer To That Advertisement Offering A Method Of Saving One-half My Gas Bills
What Is There About Betting On Horse-races That Is So Bad For The Health
The Man Who Was Run Over By The Cars The Other Day Is Now Out Of Danger
Merchant (to His Confidential Clerk)--here's A Letter From Mr
The Other Day The Head Of A Boarding-school Noticed One Of The Boys Wiping His Knife On The Table-cloth And Pounced On Him At Once
I Wish The Hot Weather Would Come Along Sighed The Thermometer
Two Wrongs Don't Make A Right
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Some One Threw A Head Of Cabbage At An Irish Orator While He Was Making A Speech Once
When The Curtain At The Theater Takes A Drop The Majority Of The Males In The Audience Go Out To Follow Suit
Pat--'twas The Divil Of A Blow The Dago Gave Yer
An Old Lady, Being Told That A Certain Lawyer Was Lying
Harold Began His Wife
Mrs
What Relation Is A Door-step To A Door-mat
The Impecunious Young Man Who Marries A Girl With A Substantial Check Attached May Very Properly Be Said To Have Been Checkmated
A Lady One Day Being In Need Of Some Small Change Called Down-stairs To The Cook And Enquired: Mary Have You Any 'coppers' Down There
If I Might Hold That Hand Again
What Are You Writing Such A Big Hand For Pat
And You Really Think That A Miss Is As Good As A Mile
Yes Indeed He's The Homeliest Man In Public Life To-day
An Irishman Comes To This Country Remains Here Ten Years And Goes Back To Ireland And Dies