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What's the matter here
"What's the matter here?"
"Man broke his neck."
"What story did he fall from?"
"Didn't fall--tried to see the top of the building."
What was the subject of your debate this evening
What's the matter here
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What is the secret of success
"What is the secret of success?" asked the Sphinx. "Push," said the Button. "Never be led," said the Pencil. "Take pains," said the Window. "Always keep cool," said the Ice. "Be up to date," said the Calendar. "Never lose your head,...
What is there about betting on horse-races that is so bad for the health
"What is there about betting on horse-races that is so bad for the health?" said young Mrs. Brown. "I never heard of anything," answered the visitor. "Didn't you? Every time Charley makes a bet he comes home and says there is something wrong ...
What is your idea of happiness
"What is your idea of happiness?" "Nothing to do and lots of time to do it in." ...
What kind of essence does a young man like when he pops the question
What kind of essence does a young man like when he pops the question? Acquiescence. ...
What kind of hen lays the longest
"What kind of hen lays the longest?" "What kind?" "A dead hen." ...
What makes so much froth in a glass of beer pa
"What makes so much froth in a glass of beer, pa?" "The barkeep, my son." ...
What makes your sister so stout now she used to be very thin
"What makes your sister so stout now, she used to be very thin?" "She's working down in a photographer's." "Why, how does that make any difference?" "Well, she's in the developing room most of the time." ...
What man in the army wore the biggest hat
"What man in the army wore the biggest hat?" "The one with the biggest head, of course." ...
What must a man be that he shall be buried with military honors
"What must a man be that he shall be buried with military honors?" "He must be a captain." "Then I lose the bet." "What did you bet?" "I bet he must be dead." ...
What relation is a door-step to a door-mat
"What relation is a door-step to a door-mat?" "What relation?" "A step-farther." ...
What sort of labor is best paid in this country
"What sort of labor is best paid in this country?" asked the English tourist. "Field labor," answered the native American. "Is that a fact?" queried the Englishman, who was inclined to be a bit skeptical. "Sure," replied the other. "You ou...
What was the subject of your debate this evening
"What was the subject of your debate this evening?" "Whisky." "Was it well discussed?" "Yes, most of the members were full of the subject." ...
What's the matter here
"What's the matter here?" "Man broke his neck." "What story did he fall from?" "Didn't fall--tried to see the top of the building." ...
What's the matter here
"What's the matter here?" asked a stranger of a small boy, as he noticed a large wedding party coming out of a church on Fifth avenue. "Nawthin' but the tied goin' out." ...
What's the matter John
"What's the matter, John? You look kind o' weather-beaten this morning." "That's exactly what I am. I bet five dollars it would rain yesterday, and it didn't!" ...
What's the matter with Smith
"What's the matter with Smith?" "Why?" "He goes along as abstractedly as though he were drunk and were seeing double." "He is. They have twins at his home." ...
When a couple are about to elope the young man asks
When a couple are about to elope the young man asks, "Does your mother know your route?" ...
When a man is short of money he finds most of his friends whom he meets short-sighted
When a man is short of money he finds most of his friends whom he meets short-sighted. ...
When a woman finds her dress does not match her complexion it is always easy enough to change her complexion
When a woman finds her dress does not match her complexion, it is always easy enough to change her complexion. ...
When I was eating my dinner to-day the butter ran
"When I was eating my dinner to-day the butter ran." "That's nothing. I was up-town last night and saw a cake walk." ...
When Lot found his wife transformed into a pillar of salt he was wise enough to let it go at that and not take a fresh one
When Lot found his wife transformed into a pillar of salt, he was wise enough to let it go at that and not take a fresh one. ...
When the curtain at the theater takes a drop the majority of the males in the audience go out to follow suit
When the curtain at the theater takes a drop the majority of the males in the audience go out to follow suit. ...
When the old man is shaking down the furnace carrying out the ashes feeding the cat and six kittens and making the beds remarked the observer of events and things of course he is too busy to hear his daughter in the parlor singing: 'Everybody Works bu
"When the old man is shaking down the furnace, carrying out the ashes, feeding the cat and six kittens, and making the beds," remarked the observer of events and things, "of course he is too busy to hear his daughter in the parlor, singing: 'Every...
When the penniless lordling to get a rich wife Of his own nationality fails He crosses the ocean with heart light and gay And robs the United States males
When the penniless lordling to get a rich wife Of his own nationality fails, He crosses the ocean with heart light and gay And robs the United States males. ...