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Whether Tall Men Or Short Men Are Best Or Bold Men Or Modest And Shy Men I Can't Say But This I Protest All The Fair Are In Favor Of Hy-men
Charlemagne Was In Need Of Amusement
Couples Making Love Will Beware Of The Rubber Plant
Ma What Is A Panama Man Called
Adversity Is Not Without Comfort--your Enemy May Be In Harder Luck Than You
Ah
Electricity Is A Great Educator
Yes There Is One Part Of The Dough-nut That Wouldn't Give You Dyspepsia
Mrs
How Are You To-day


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What's The Matter Here
Mrs
How By The Statesman Insincere Man's Weary Soul Is Vexed
When We First Dined At A Cafe We Feared They'd Drop Their Trays But Later We Learned Somewhat To Our Dismay It Takes--as Scores Of Men Will Say-- A Big Tip To Upset A Waiter
To-morrow Never Comes They Say; But All Such Talk Is Idle Gush For When We Have A Debt To Pay To-morrow Gets There With A Rush
Rowley Powley Pudding And Pie Kissed The Girls And Made Them Cry
He Went On A Lark So His Wife Did Remark And Some Angry Words Too Did She Mutter
He Was A Genial Smiling Man And Fond Of Whisky Plain But When He Joined The Temperance Club He Never Smiled Again
My Dentist Has An Eagle Eye And Vicious Tools He Hacks With He's Clever But I've Come To Think He'd Make A Better Blacksmith
Of All The Saws That I Ever Saw Saw I Never Saw A Saw Saw Like This Saw Saws




What's the matter here

Puns Home









"What's the matter here?"



"Man broke his neck."



"What story did he fall from?"



"Didn't fall--tried to see the top of the building."











Next: According to a florist's magazine Jacks are becoming cheap

Previous: Nature never allows anything to run to waist



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Puns

Everybody Knows A Woman Is Hard To Please
There Is A Man Who Never Knew Such A Thing As Fear
The Barber--did I Ever Shave You Before
A Deaf And Dumb Mute Recently Went Into A Bicycle Shop And Picked Up A Hub And Spoke
Have You Much Room In Your New Flat
Biggs--that Butcher Is An Awkward Fellow
Some One Threw A Head Of Cabbage At An Irish Orator While He Was Making A Speech Once
There Is But One Thing Said The Professor Of Medicine Gravely That We Know About Death
This Liver Is Awful Maud Said Mr
What Sort Of Labor Is Best Paid In This Country
She--they Say That Your Father Is A Millionaire
I Had Soup In A Restaurant The Other Day And Found An Oyster In It
Now Why Remarked The Little Dog In Speaking To The Tree Would You Say That The Heart Of You Is Like The Tail Of Me
He--the Fact Is You Women Make Fools Of The Men
If A Guest At A Restaurant Ordered A Lobster And Ate It And Another Guest Did The Same What Would The Latter's Telephone Number Be
Castles In The Air Are Walled In By Fancy Remarked The Poet
Husband--where's Your Mistress
Jack--are You A Suitor For Miss Juliet's Hand
Don't Talk To Me About Compulsory Vaccination
Do You Know The Nature Of An Oath Ma'am
What Do You Think Of The Statement That There Are Three Hundred Haunted Houses In New York
--i'm Very Sorry For That Boy
What Do You Think Of Windig
Massachusetts Is Noted For Boots And Shoes
The Other Day The Head Of A Boarding-school Noticed One Of The Boys Wiping His Knife On The Table-cloth And Pounced On Him At Once